IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8.5

Having police officers patrolling the streets is often considered an essential way to reduce crime. How effective do you think police street patrols are? What other ways of reducing crime can you propose?

#police #officers #streets #crime #street #patrols
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To keep citizens’ lives safe, patrols put a high effort into looking after
people
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 in the
street
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. In my opinion, having
street
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 policies is not the most effective way to prevent
crimes
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 and there could be another way to reduce them better.
This
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 essay aims to present why it is not too effective and how it could be improved.
To begin
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 with, even though there are many cops working in the
street
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, they can not cover every single corner of the
street
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.
That is
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,
people
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 who want to commit
crimes
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 always can choose a place where there are no controls of authorities. It is exemplified by Sao Paulo, Brazil, as they still have a huge amount of
crimes
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although
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 the Government inputs more
street
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 policies.
Therefore
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, it is necessary to examine if it is functioning well indeed.
In addition
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 to
this
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, those human resources could focus on more serious issues in demand, because
street
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 police do not always witness crime scenes, probably it might be waste of time for less likely possibilities.
Instead
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, they could locate policies for cases
such
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 as serial killer investigations or drug dealer issues. In
this
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 sense, police could raise the effectiveness by focusing on the more urgent situations. To reduce the crime rate, some alternatives can be introduced.
Firstly
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, setting more CCTV helps a lot to track crucial moments, since it records what human beings can not always have eyes on. To illustrate, in Korea, crime rates are lower than in many other countries as CCTVs are common in the
street
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. For
this
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 reason, police can use data recorded by CCTVs and find clues easily.
Secondly
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, giving stricter punishment will make
people
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 fear doing illegal acts, meaning that they have to spend more time in jail or pay higher fines. In
this
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 regard, it is essential to establish a strict system to prevent accidents by law. In conclusion, some
people
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 might think
street
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 patrolling helps stop
crimes
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, but I think it is closer to symbolic actions with no high effectiveness only. They can not control all the places and they could focus more on the demanded area.
Therefore
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, setting more CCTVs and having stronger penalties by law will contribute to decreasing problems in our society.
Submitted by kwoneunji225 on

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