Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss these two views and give your opinion.

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Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
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of
population
Add an article
the population
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might
concider
Correct your spelling
consider
available
sport
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sports
show examples
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
a perfect way of improving people's general
health
Use synonyms
. Some
believe
Replace the word
belief
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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otherwise
Linking Words
and count on other factors too.
These two opposite point
Change the determiner
This two opposite point
These two opposite points
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of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
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will be discussed below and end with a personal belief. There are certain activity-based tools which can be installed for public
utalize
Correct your spelling
utilize
. In
this
Linking Words
case, these kinds of
equipments
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equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
support all ages of communities (like specialized bikes for everyone in Switzerland),
citizens
Correct word choice
and citizens
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will be encouraged to use them and be seen as
a
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apply
show examples
role
model
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models
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to others.
Therefore
Linking Words
, being active can be prescribed by professionals to avoid increasing
health
Use synonyms
problems nowadays. Another effect might be the tendency of
bussy
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busy
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workers to try
exersicing
Correct your spelling
exercising
in
Change preposition
at
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any hour of their occupied day.
Although
Linking Words
availability
Add an article
the availability
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of the
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
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places can be astonishingly impressive, some of them are pricy and common individuals can not purchase them freely. Because of
this
Linking Words
, some ignore body movements and
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
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might choose the cheaper kinds.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
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we can mention enormous
different
Correct quantifier usage
number of different
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types of options which affect public
health
Use synonyms
like food and housing, which are neglected consistently in most countries. As we can witness obesity can kill quicker than poverty and malnutrition by comparing developed countries (American states) to developing ones (African cities). Overall, I believe as long
societies
Correct word choice
as societies
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are thriving in economic and
technology
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technological
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matters, the
neccecity
Correct your spelling
necessity
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
selfcare
Correct your spelling
self-care
self care
is growing inevitably. Governments and private sections should invest
Change preposition
in
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
public
health
Use synonyms
more and more by providing
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
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sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
Correct your spelling
equipment
Correct your spelling
equipment
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
after taking care of
Correct article usage
the primary
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primary
Correct article usage
the primary
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needs of humanity.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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