Some people think that consumerism can boost the economy and create business and jobs. Others consider that society becomes a 'throw-away society' producing unnecessary waste. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

People
hold different views about how
consumerism
affects the
economy
. Some
people
think that
consumerism
can contribute to boosting the local
economy
and newly generated
businesses
and jobs,
while
others say that
society
becomes a throw-away
society
manufacturing unnecessary waste.
Although
I agree that because of
consumerism
society
turns to
throwaway
Correct article usage
a throwaway
show examples
society
, I believe that it can
support
the indigenous
economy
and create diverse
businesses
and job places. On the one hand, those who think that
consumerism
results in
throwaway
Correct article usage
a throwaway
show examples
society
claim that it can have detrimental effects on the
society
and local
economy
. They assert that
consumerism
creates waste and eventually leads to the depletion of natural resources, which in turn can have negative effects
such
as environmental degradation. Mass production, resource exploitation and transportation contribute to pollution, climate change and habitat destruction. As
people
buy products,
businesses
start to produce more, leading to
throwaway
Correct article usage
a throwaway
show examples
society
.
For instance
, there are some
people
who have brand loyalty and it doesn’t matter for them if they need the product they bought.
On the other hand
, others say that
consumerism
has positive effects on the local
economy
, leading to new
businesses
and jobs. They think that nowadays
due to
the increasing demand of the world creating new
businesses
and job places is a good way to
support
destitute
people
.
For instance
, industries need employees during the production and transportation process. As
consumerism
increases
businesses
will produce more products, benefitting both local
people
and the
economy
. In my opinion,striking a balance between the economic benefits of
consumerism
and its societal and environmental costs is significant.
However
, I think
consumerism
is a good way to
support
the local
economy
and
people
, by providing new job places and opportunities. Taking everything into account, I believe that
consumerism
is significant in order to
support
indigenous
people
as well as
the local
economy
Submitted by writingbhos on

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Task Achievement
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Coherence and Cohesion
Work on diversifying your connectors and transition phrases to enhance the flow of your essay. While your essay is easy to follow, the use of a wider range of vocabulary for connecting ideas could improve its readability and coherence.
Task Achievement
In future essays, aim to explore the counterargument more deeply. By showcasing a clear understanding of the opposing view, you display a balanced perspective which enriches your argument.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Get your IELTS Essential Vocabulary List —
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Consumerism
  • Economic growth
  • Demand and supply
  • Employment creation
  • Overconsumption
  • Environmental degradation
  • Throw-away culture
  • Landfills
  • Innovation and competition
  • Sustainability
  • Resource depletion
  • Ecological balance
  • Circular economies
  • Responsible consumption
  • Material possessions
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