Some people believe that parents should limit their hours of watching TV and playing computer games for children, but instead encourage to read books. Do you agree or disagree?

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In recent years, advancement in technology has

revolutionalised

Verb problem

revolutionised

show examples

how

children

Use synonyms

spend their free time. Engaging in online

games

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or watching television

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

becoming more common nowadays. Some people think that

children

Use synonyms

are better off reading

books

Use synonyms

than playing

games

Use synonyms

online

while

Linking Words

others think

otherwise

Linking Words

. I believe if done in moderation,

children

Use synonyms

can gain benefits via the former activities. First of all, valuable knowledge can be gained via educational

computer

Use synonyms

games

Use synonyms

Moreover

Linking Words

, it is a more interesting and interactive option for

children

Use synonyms

to engage in learning.

For example

Linking Words

programmes

Correct your spelling

programs

show examples

like Word Search, Sudoku and Fill The Missing Words allow

children

Use synonyms

to master their vocabulary better. Some

games

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that involve teamwork will aid

to instill

Change preposition

in instilling

show examples

this

Linking Words

skill in them.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, TV shows

such

Linking Words

as Ted Talk and Discovery Channels allow

children

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to learn

while

Linking Words

relaxing, killing two birds with one stone. Even more, parents can watch these programmes

together with

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their

children

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, making the family bonds stronger.

While

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some might prefer reading

books

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, it can be quite dull and boring for young

children

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as they can not interact with them directly.It

also

Linking Words

lacks the interface that

computer

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games

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offer which would attract

children

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to spend long hours with.

Books

Use synonyms

might not be available as easily as gadgets

such

Linking Words

as computers and mobile phones are everywhere in

this

Linking Words

modern society. In summary, I believe that

children

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can learn better with the correct

computer

Use synonyms

games

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and TV shows rather than reading

books

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.Parents will need to monitor their

children

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so they don't lose track of time and become addicted to

computer

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games

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so their studies will not be affected negatively.

chinieyFri Dec 30 2022

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task achievement

Ensure a clear and concise introduction that presents your standpoint more explicitly.

task achievement

Add more specific examples to support your points and enhance clarity in your arguments.

coherence and cohesion

Incorporate linking phrases or words to smoothly transition between ideas, improving overall flow.

coherence and cohesion

Strengthen the conclusion by restating your main argument with more emphasis on its significance.

task achievement

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a balanced view on the issue, which is commendable.

task achievement

The use of examples, such as educational computer games and specific TV shows, adds credibility to your argument.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

266 words

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Some people believe that parents should limit their hours of watching TV and playing computer games for children, but instead encourage to read books. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe famous people's support towards international aid organizations draws the attention to problems, while others think celebrities make the problems less important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say government should give health care the first priorities, some others believe education is more important priorities to spend the taxpayers' money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Mobile phones have brought many benefits, but they have also had negative effects. Do the disadvantages of having mobile phones outweigh the advantages?

Some people say that playing computer games is bad for children in every aspect. Others say that playing computer games can have positive effetcs on the way children develop. Discuss oth views and give your opinion.