Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #time #activities #children #parents

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In today's society, leisure

time

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is essential for

children

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to release stress from their

activities

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. Some people argue that parents have an order to set the

activities

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while

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others believe

children

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have the free will to choose. In

this

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essay, I will discuss both sides, but I personally agree that

children

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should have the freedom to spend their free

time

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. On one hand, most people consider giving responsibility to the parents to choose

activities

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for their

kids

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because they want them to

kids

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have productive and beneficial

activities

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As a result

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, parent has

time

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to check on their

kids

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. They are afraid that the

kids

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will spend their

time

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playing video games. Meanwhile, if they set the

activities

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, they can ask their

kids

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to do robotics.

However

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, on the other side, which I strongly agree with,

kids

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should have the opportunity to spend their free

time

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Children

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mostly choose

activities

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based on their favourite

activities

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such

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as playing sports or watching movies.

While

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doing that,

children

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learn new skills and discover themselves more deeply.

As a result

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, they will have stable and stagnant mental health and conceive their environment more.

For example

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kids

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like to play soccer with their friends in school, and from

that

Correct determiner usage

those

show examples

games, the

kids

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learned

Wrong verb form

learn

show examples

how to work as a team. In conclusion,

while

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people argue that parents should have the opportunity to set their

kids

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activities

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, I strongly believe that

children

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should do that themselves, which might be very beneficial for their mental and personality development.

Submitted by yannn on Tue Oct 22 2024

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coherence cohesion

Try to avoid repetitive phrases. For example, instead of using "most people consider," you could say "many believe," to add variety to your vocabulary.

task achievement

Ensure that all ideas are fully developed for clarity and completeness. For instance, expand on why children choosing their activities might lead to stable mental health.

introduction conclusion present

The essay presents a clear introduction that outlines the topic effectively.

complete response

Both sides of the argument are discussed, and the writer’s opinion is clearly stated.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

251 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

balanced development
expose children to
tailored activities
promote discipline
foster independence
genuine interests
free play
problem-solving skills
emotional well-being
unstructured time
personal exploration
structured activities

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Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Most high-level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 percent female. So, some people suggest that companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women. To what extent do you agree ?

Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this is happening? What can governments do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produced?

Nowadays, stress-related illnesses are becoming increasingly common. What do you think is the cause of this? What solution can you suggest?

In some cultures, children are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of gibing children this message?