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Band 7

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high level of sugars which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #drink #products #level #sugars #health #people #sugar
Nowadays, we all run behind in processed
foods
 and artificially flavoured drinks and it will create more and more health problems.If we hike the
price
 of sugary
products
people
 will have a chance to buy lesser count.
However
, I disagree with that point because if manufacturers increase the
price
 of processed
foods
 most
people
 buy those kinds of stuff .in the essay let us review my point of view.
Firstly
, most manufactured
foods
 and drinks contain a high level of sugar and
this
 sugar will increase obesity in
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
.Especially, our younger generation is fully addicted to particular
products
such
 as chocolate,noodles and flavoured drinks.If we increased the
price
 of the
products
 more
people
 ready to buy the goods but
that is
 not a solution .we have to be aware of unhealthy diets and need to teach our kids to get good nutrition.
For example
, manufacturers increased the
price
 of dairy milk which is a chocolate concern but consumers didn't care about the
price
 of the product because
people
 liked it much and that taste tempts their minds.
On the other hand
, Advertisements for junk food
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
 off everywhere like
Change preposition
on
show examples
television , smartphones and the internet etc.
People
 are forced to watch adverts in cinemas and a lot of advertisement popups
displays
Add a missing verb
are displays
show examples
 on mobile so most
people
 are attracted to that visual .
price
 hike is not a solution for reducing to intake the of sugary
products
 we have to modulate those
products
 with less sugar .recent times, most of the children affected tooth decay and obesity due to intake of high-level sugary
products
. To sum up, In our hectic ,lifestyle we all have to focus on our health and take good nutrition
foods
 and need to focus on more advertisements and campaigns for processed and sugary
products
.
Submitted by keyarthi on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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