In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

#cultures #children

In many nations around the world,

children

are usually been told that if they

work

hard, they can get anything that they want. There are some benefits and drawbacks towards

this

saying. On the one hand, the merits of telling

children

that they can achieve anything in life only if they

work

hard enough

Remove the comma

apply

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will encourage them to

work

harder to achieve a certain goal that they wanted.

This

can give a child the idea that what they are doing will be worth it in the end.

Hence

, they will put more

efforts

Fix the agreement mistake

effort

show examples

into what they are doing to achieve their goals.

In addition

, it will

also

give

children

a clear goal to strive towards.

This

can help

children

determine what they want and have a clear step to achieve those goals.

For instance

, in order to study abroad in Canada, foreign students have to complete certain

criterias

Correct your spelling

criteria

such

as IELTS, their study plan, and their finances. With the aforementioned benefits, there is a major drawback

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show examples

doing

this

. It would heavily damage the

child

Change noun form

child's

show examples

self-esteem and

confident

Replace the word

confidence

show examples

when they failed. Some goals are

unachieveable

Correct your spelling

unachievable

achievable

, and people telling

children

that they can achieve anything with hard

work

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

will lead them to failure.

Thus

, giving them false

perception

Fix the agreement mistake

perceptions

show examples

about life and

also

broke

Wrong verb form

breaking

show examples

their

confident

Replace the word

confidence

show examples

For example

, telling

children

that they can create a time machine, which is theoretically impossible, to go back in time and fix their mistakes

everytime

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every time

show examples

that they do something wrong. In conclusion, encouraging

children

by telling them that they can attain anything just by hard

work

does have

Change the pronoun

its

show examples

merits by giving them a clear goal and motivation to

work

hard, but

also

have a major disadvantage that it will damage the child

confident

Replace the word

confidence

show examples

when they fail.

Submitted by NHD on Mon Jan 02 2023

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

Your opinion

It is important for people to take risks, in both their professional lives and personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Prison is the common way in most countries to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people a better education. Do you agree or disagree.

Robots and artificial intelligence are being developed to replace humans in the workplace. Why is this happening? Do you think this will have a positive or a negative impact on society?

Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodworking should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family. To that extent do you agree or disagree?