Some people believe that if people are allowed to buy guns, they will be able to protect themselves and the crime rate can be lower. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

#people #guns #crime #rate #disagree？

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Holding

weapons

Use synonyms

is a controversial issue, a lot of people think that there is no matter

Correct word choice

whether to

show examples

buy

Wrong verb form

buying

show examples

a weapon as a

self-defense

Change the spelling

self-defence

show examples

tool. As well as, it deters

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

violence in the community, but I completely disagree with making

guns

Correct article usage

the guns

show examples

trade legal. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will discuss

this

Linking Words

more. On the one hand, firearms can be used in a number of urgent cases. To illustrate, the ones who have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

vast wealth should be armed to protect themselves from criminals and settlers.

Also

Linking Words

, women in many countries are facing kidnappers and trickles,

thus

Linking Words

the government allow them to buy pistols with

special

Add an article

a special

show examples

license.

Consequently

Linking Words

, making

weapons

Use synonyms

legal should be minimalistic used and admissible with critical license.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the spread of firearms builds a violent society with high murder rates. Not only, innocent people can buy

weapons

Use synonyms

to protect themselves, but

also

Linking Words

criminals will purchase them.

As a result

Linking Words

, it poses a serious danger to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the

first

Linking Words

choice for

patient

Fix the agreement mistake

patients

show examples

people with depression will be the gun to suicide. One clear example is Sweden, which has the biggest rate of suicide cases in the world because of the enormous spread of

weapons

Use synonyms

. To summarize,

Firearm

Correct article usage

a Firearm

show examples

is not a toy to make it legal for individuals.

By contrast

Linking Words

, it’s a serious, violent and destructive tool that

able

Add a missing verb

is able

show examples

to destroy communities in a few days.

Hence

Linking Words

, it must be owned

Change preposition

show examples

whom are responsible for protecting our land and special units of

police

Add an article

the police

show examples

In addition

Linking Words

, there are numerous other alternatives to guns that can be used

instead

Linking Words

Therefore

Linking Words

, in my opinion, I strongly disagree.

Submitted by rehameldweik on Tue Jan 03 2023

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

269 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

advocate
debate
controversial
firearm
self-defense
crime prevention
deterrence
gun violence
gun control laws
public safety
accidental discharge
suicide prevention
impulsive
accessibility
legislation
firearm regulation
balancing
individual rights
crime rate
violence
arguments
opponents
supporters
proponents
second amendment

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In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development