Some people use social media to keep in touch with other people and new events. Do you think advantages of this technology outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #media #touch #events #technology

Nowadays, technology is all over the world and

people

became

Wrong verb form

have become

show examples

addicted to social

media

and use it on a daily basis.

However

, In

this

essay, I will illustrate the pros and cons of social

media

thus

, describing my point of view and supporting it with examples as well. First of all, the certain purpose of inventing social

media

is to keep

people

connected and in touch despite the local distance, you can easily contact your friend who lives in a different country and you can share with them your news and keep them posted, which from my perspective, I believe it is a good thing because some

people

had to leave their hometown for specific circumstances

such

as job opportunity or College whatsoever,

therefore

, having access to communicate with the

people

you love is basically what we all need.

However

, despite these advantages being addicted to social

media

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

a lot of consequences,

for example

, it will affect your social skills and not constantly practising face-to-face communication will influence your performance in socializing with

people

which leads to

facing

Verb problem

apply

show examples

difficulties in connecting with others.

Nevertheless

, a lot of

people

do not use social

media

to contact others

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but to follow specific influencers, which is all right by the way,

however

, not every content creator deserves you to take the time to watch his content, some of them share the most outrageous and disrespectful content not considering the consequences of their actions. In conclusion,

besides

all the advantages of social

media

, I believe that it is stupid to focus on an unrealistic lifestyle and ignore the significance of real-life communication because socializing in person could possibly improve your confidence and increase your self-esteem as well.

Submitted by Layanosama on Tue Jan 03 2023

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task response

The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of social media. However, there is a need for more specific examples to support the arguments.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, framing the essay effectively. Ensure that each body paragraph is clearly connected to the thesis statement to strengthen coherence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

284 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people use social media to keep in touch with other people and new events. Do you think advantages of this technology outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

When we meet someone for the first time, we generally decide very quickly what kind of person we think they are and if we like them or not. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Some people believe that technology has made man more social. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Increasing taxes would raise prices and lower consumption.

Plastic bags, plastic bottles and plastic packaging are bad for the environment. What damage does plastic do to the environment ? What can be done by individuals and government to solve this problem ?

Some people prefer to live in a house, while others feel that there are more advantages to living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disadvantages of living in a house compared with living in an apartment?