IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

 For centuries, important parts of education have remained such as reading, writing and math. With the advent of computers, some people think that computer skill be made as a fourth skill to be added to the list. To what extent do you agree?

#centuries #parts #education #math #advent #computers #people #computer #skill #list
Education
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 various parts. We must learn and master all of it. And because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
electronic
Replace the word
electronics
show examples
 have been upgrading the use of
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
 is widely known. I agree that
computer
 skills should be part of our education. Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people nowadays use
Add an article
a computer
the computer
show examples
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their everyday job. We cannot deny the fact that it helps us a lot on finishing our work quickly and can save more time.
For
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
 in the past, teachers are just writing their lecture
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 a piece of notebook which is vulnerable because it might get wet and or lost. But recently, with the help of computers, they can
easyly
Correct your spelling
easily
 type their lectures and just save
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. Without thinking it might get
loss
Replace the word
lost
show examples
.
Secondly
, most companies are requiring applicants to know how to use computers. Because by using
Add an article
a computer
the computer
show examples
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
managers can monitor their
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
 with their work through the
computer
 and they will be sure that it
is keep
Change the verb form
is kept
show examples
 safe on the
computer
. Rather than in a paper. In my opinion,
computer
 skill is
also
 important same
like
Change preposition
as
show examples
 writing,reading and math. And it should be part of
Correct article usage
the students
show examples
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
 curriculum.
Submitted by athena26 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Digital literacy
  • Information technology
  • Essential skills
  • Integration
  • Technological prowess
  • Curriculum
  • Global competitiveness
  • 21st-century skills
  • Pedagogy
  • Access to information
  • Innovation
  • Digital divide
  • Educational equity
  • Online learning platforms
  • Digital native
  • Coding and programming
  • Computer proficiency
  • Technological fluency
  • E-learning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: