Some people say that with the development of modern technology, printed books, newspapers and magazines lose their importance. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #development #technology #books #newspapers #magazines #importance

Few individuals

are having

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

an opinion that

due to

the growth of new and advanced

mechanisim

Correct your spelling

mechanisms

traditional

Correct article usage

the traditional

show examples

way of reading will become

obolete

Correct your spelling

obsolete

. I

completly

Correct your spelling

completely

disagree with

this

statement . All points supporting my opinion will be discussed

further

this

essay. The foremost reason is by using the platform of E-reading our eyes

gets

Correct subject-verb agreement

get

show examples

strained.

Varoius

Correct your spelling

Various

health diseases are taking place if mankind

continue

Change the verb form

continues

show examples

to read from any electronic devices.

Moreover

, in the

longrun

Correct your spelling

long run

eyes would get weak and serious blindness can be caused if

this

habit is continued . To illustrate

further

, many students from the USA are getting spectacles because they have shifted their syllabus

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

electronic platform .

Additionally

, individuals can mark notes and cut their favourite articles from

newspaper

Fix the agreement mistake

newspapers

show examples

and

magzines

Correct your spelling

magazines

magazine

which is not possible in E-news and

E-magzines

Correct your spelling

E-magazines

Furthermore

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

arises

Change the verb form

arise

show examples

when a person tries to share any E-book for the purpose of reading to another individual.

This

creates a lot of

hinderance

Correct your spelling

hindrance

hindrances

in our daily routine and a constant fear of getting caught

hampered

Verb problem

apply

show examples

in our

head

Fix the agreement mistake

heads

show examples

Moreover

, many individuals who have used paper

formed

Replace the word

forms

show examples

of material for the purpose of reading are accustomed to

use

Change the verb form

using

show examples

this

way only.they will not adapt the

mordern

Correct your spelling

modern

technology for their

convinience

Correct your spelling

convenience

. To cite an example people from

age

Correct article usage

the age

show examples

group 50 to 70 in India like to read

newspaper

Fix the agreement mistake

newspapers

show examples

in a traditional way only . In conclusion ,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

mordern

Correct your spelling

modern

technology is very

habdy

Correct your spelling

handy

hardy

but the traditional ways still prevail in the heart of

may

Correct your spelling

many

show examples

people because of the

convinience

Correct your spelling

convenience

surrounding

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

Submitted by hadialakdawala on Sun Jan 08 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

The essay lacks a clear and comprehensive response to the question prompt. The arguments provided are not effectively supported and lack relevant, specific examples.

coherence and cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is weak, making it difficult to follow the author's points. The introduction and conclusion are present but not effectively developed. The main points lack clear support and coherence throughout the essay.

lexical resource

The essay presents a limited range of vocabulary and lacks precise and appropriate language use. There are also issues with word choice, which affects the overall lexical resource of the essay.

grammatical range

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including issues with verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. There are also errors in punctuation and sentence formation.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
31Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

260 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their spare time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.
While some believe that children should use their spare time in team activities, others think that they must learn how to spend this time alone. In my opinion, parents should motivate offspring to work on their own because though spending spare time in group activities can teach youngsters some practical social skills, being on their own can help them follow their instincts freely and pursue their interests.
5
band
Some people spend most of their lives living close to where they were born. What might be the reasons for this? What are the advantages and disadvantages?”
Nowadays, a number of people prefer to spend their lives close to their home town, rather than moving somewhere. There is one main reason for that, which is not going out of your comfort zone. Firstly, action like leaving your comfort zone is hard to do physically, as well as mentally. For instance, the enormous number of individuals, do not want to leave their familiar places, in light of the fact that of fear. It leads to uncompleted dreams and achievements, such as studying at a top-notch university or applying for a well-paid job in another country or city. Also, it can happen, owing to a lack of resources or opportunities elsewhere, as well as financial constraints. This can cause an unsatisfied feeling during your whole life, and it is going to be only, due to lack of strength. Furthermore, you not only need to be brave, but educated abundance and have great skills for moving abroad. Secondly, a sense of belonging will not exist for you for an extremely long period, it may eve...
5
band
You are looking for a part-time job at a football club. Write a letter to the manager of the football club. In your letter, introduce yourself explain what experience and special skills you have tell him/her when you think you could start
I am writing this letter to explain my interest.Last week I saw your advertisement on social media,so I applied for a part-time job at your football club
7.5
band
Some people believe that if a child commits a crime, he or she should be punished, while others think it is the child’s parent who should be punished. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is often held that a child should be sentenced for wrongdoings, while others believe that it should be their parents instead. This essay will discuss both views in detail and argue in favour of the former.
7.5
band
Some people believe that governments should pay full course fees for students who want to study in universities. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
A debate over whether the government should pay the full fees of the student who wants to study in universities or not has long been a subject of discussion. Some people believe that paying full course fees by the government will provide an opportunity for students who want to study in universities. But, some people think that if there is no fee for students then students will not take it seriously and will take it for granted.

Some people say that with the development of modern technology, printed books, newspapers and magazines lose their importance. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people spend most of their lives living close to where they were born. What might be the reasons for this? What are the advantages and disadvantages?”

You are looking for a part-time job at a football club. Write a letter to the manager of the football club. In your letter, introduce yourself explain what experience and special skills you have tell him/her when you think you could start

Some people believe that if a child commits a crime, he or she should be punished, while others think it is the child’s parent who should be punished. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that governments should pay full course fees for students who want to study in universities. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?