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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Fewer young people choose to work in farming. What are the reasons? Should young people be encouraged to do farming work?

#people #work
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In
this
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 modern day and age, the younger generation often opts for working in other fields
instead
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 of agriculture. There are several reasons for
this
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 trend and I personally think that it is fundamental to motivate young
people
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 to have an occupation related to farming. Young
people
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 choose not to
work
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 in farming due to certain reasons.
To begin
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 with, there are several
people
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 who do not want to
work
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 outdoors. Those
people
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 prefer working in a building in order to experience the fresh atmosphere to staying long hours under the sun’s heat.
For instance
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, in Vietnam, numerous young
people
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 opt for applying for white-collar positions
instead
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 of being farmers.
Moreover
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, there is not enough
land
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 for farming due to the increased use of
land
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 for housing. The main reason for
this
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 is that the world population is rising at a rapid rate.
As a result
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, when having an empty area of
land
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,
people
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 usually construct a house
instead
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 of using it for agricultural purposes. It is my firm belief that young
people
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 should be inspired to do agricultural
work
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. The
first
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 reason is that the demand for food is on the rise. Too many
people
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 opting for working in offices means that there may not be enough farmers. As a consequence, there could be a lack of food supplies to provide for the expanding world population.
Secondly
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, the younger generation may create higher productivity. The main reason for
this
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 is that they tend to stay updated with the latest techniques and technologies.
Thus
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, they can utilize these cutting-edge technologies in order to boost productivity. In conclusion, the reluctance to
work
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 outdoors and the decrease in the area of agricultural
land
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 could be the two main reasons why young
people
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 do not select to be a farmer.
However
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, the younger generation should be encouraged to
work
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 in the field of agriculture due to the high demand for food and their ability to apply developed technology.
Submitted by huynhtrucminhthu39 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • intrinsic preference
  • liberating
  • physical activity
  • chronic diseases
  • natural light
  • job satisfaction
  • environmental connection
  • monotonous
  • dynamic
  • stimulating
  • fulfilling career
  • creativity
  • inspire
  • office politics
  • corporate structures
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