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Band 4

To what extent do you agree with the following statement? Anything that is good for you can also be bad for you if you do it too much.

Generating habits that encourage us to feel happier about the good things we can do can help us be better, perform better, and reduce our emotions
for
Change preposition
about
show examples
 the bad things we may have done. There is an opinion that says that anything
that is
 good for you can
also
 be bad if you overdo it. I totally agree with
this
 phrase because some examples,
such
 as consuming too much fast street food could lead to obesity or the use of cells or electronic machines for a long
time
 could damage our mental and visual
health
.
First
 of all, many people do not realize that consuming too much fast street food can be harmful to
health
, since all the ingredients can contain preseventants and dyes-stuff that can affect our body and lead us to obesity, as an example many years ago, I lived alone, worked and studied at the same
time
 and did not have
time
 to cook and resorted to buying fast food, For
me
Add a comma
,me
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 it was good because it quickly solved my diet, but at the same
time
Add a comma
,time
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 it was bad because it was affecting my
health
 and my body, leading me to have serious
health
 problems.
However
, my low self-esteem made me turn to the doctor
recommending
Wrong verb form
recommended
show examples
 a bullet-ridden diet and taking some exercise routines.
On the other hand
 the generation of today,
we
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
use many electronic devices to facilitate our daily lives, whether for entertainment, work or study,
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
show examples
 we forget that life could be much better if we used
less
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
any type of electronic device as well as our parents, who did not have the opportunity to understand or manipulate any type of device as it is now the computer and the cell phone. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
 these two simple examples show my opinion of using something excessively, and I am sure that it will always have terrible results for everyone. (314
word
Change to a plural noun
words
show examples
) Written by Shirley Adriana Ospina Student Number 250834
Submitted by shirlyos on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • bilingual
  • multilingual
  • fluency
  • communicate
  • cognitive skills
  • cultural awareness
  • opportunities
  • globalized world
  • job market
  • interact
  • linguistic abilities
  • cultural exchange
  • language proficiency
  • language barrier
  • foreign travel
  • personal growth
  • academic achievement
  • self-confidence
  • enhance
  • cross-cultural communication
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