Some people think young people should go to university to further their education while others think they should been encouraged to work as car mechanics or builders etc. to serve society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #university #education #work #car #mechanics #builders #society

It is often debated, some people believe that youngsters should serve

society

by working as mechanics or builders after they graduated from high school, while others think that achieving

further

education in university is the best decision. There are some arguments

Change preposition

for

show examples

both ideas that I will discuss in

this

essay. On the one hand, opponents of higher education say that earning money at a young

age

is better to enjoy

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

old

age

. The teenager will have proper finance

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

if they start working earlier.

Hence

, people will be independent to support their life when they turn to adulthood.

Furthermore

, young

age

is the perfect time to provide

society

Replace the word

social

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services because they do not have any responsibility

serving

Change the verb form

to serve

show examples

their family. The youth have more free time to enjoy their life, so it is wiser to be used for

working

Change the form of the verb

work

show examples

that needs more power.

On the other hand

, though, proponents of

this

view argue that young

age

is the best moment to learn more because of the great spirit which is very familiar for exploring knowledge. The students can learn the principal science, so they can serve

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society

greater by optimal implementation in their future workplace.

In addition

, the teenager can get a better job which pays a more fantastic salary with

effortless

Correct article usage

an effortless

show examples

workload. The proper creativity development

that is

gained from

university

Add an article

a university

show examples

leads the

graduated

Replace the word

graduate

show examples

student to be a leader in the company.

For example

, mechanical engineers manage the service station effortlessly while receiving a profitable fee. Overall, both opinions have specific benefits for teenagers and the community.

However

, it seems to me that working as graduated university

youngsters

Fix the agreement mistake

youngster

show examples

is worth serving

society

optimally and profitably

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Wed Jan 11 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

277 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Topic Vocabulary:

higher education
vocational training
skillset
employment landscape
economic contributions
hands-on experience
critical thinking skills
practical knowledge
tuition fees
trade professions
essential workforce
academic qualifications

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Some people think young people should go to university to further their education while others think they should been encouraged to work as car mechanics or builders etc. to serve society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones for communication has a negative effect on young people's reading and writing skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

At the present time the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?