IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

In many countries, fast food is becoming cheaper and more widely available. Do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?

#countries #food #outweigh
There has been a
significat
Correct your spelling
significant
 growth of fast
food
 restaurants in the world together with
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 inexpensive prices. Fast
food
 is believed that it is unhealthy for
people
 because of its chemical content;
however
, the benefits of the
food
palys
Correct your spelling
plays
 more
portion
Fix the agreement mistake
portions
show examples
 in both undeveloped and developed
countries
. The availability of fast
food
 in many places is a disadvantage because the
food
 is believed unsafe to be eaten. Making fast
food
 serve faster than other
food
,
there
Correct word choice
and there
show examples
 are some chemical materials in the
food
 that are assumed dangerous for
people
 in the future. So by eating it, illnesses
such
 as obesity will be found in the human body.
Thus
, the drawback
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the
food
 is that it will badly impact
people
.
On the other hand
, there are some benefits of cheaper and widespread fast
food
. One of which is that
people
 in developing
countries
 could afford the
food
 without paying much
maney
Correct your spelling
money
. It is commonly known that poor
countries
 still have problems with starvation because of having less budget. With the existence of cheaper fast
food
, poor
people
 could purchase it with a lower budget, so that starving will not be a problem anymore in the
countries
. In developed
countries
, fast
food
 restaurants could help
people
 in the
countries
 to accelerate waiting
time
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
serving
food
. While commuting to work is really rapid in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
countries
 with almost no
time
 for meals, the restaurants could provide them with
food
 in a very short
time
 and they can even eat on the way to work.
Therefore
,
this
 advantage could provide a short
time
 for
people
 to have meals. In conclusion, there are both advantages and disadvantages of fast
food
 in many
countries
.
However
, the advantages are more massive in both poor and rich
countries
 in accelerating
food
 serving and its affordability.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: