Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement
In modern society,
people
are offered many options
and choices in almost every aspect of life what the food
types we eat , careers that we pursue, or what kind of fashion we wear. I strongly agree and I believe that many of the options
we pursue have negative effects because this
multiple can make people
more confused, indecisive, and overwhelmed.
Firstly
, globalisation and the growth of technology make many people
know and can try everything new or any culture
in another country. This
globalisation can many people
to be confused about their culture
and the other countries cause mixable traditional cultures. For example
, K-drama or K-pop make many citizens in other countries want to try their food
, culture
, and fashion. As a result
, the country tries to mix the traditions and this
makes the original culture
lose its originality and this
can lead to people
's indecision about the identity of the original food
.
Secondly
, the sociality norms and the expectations of other people
make many people
become stressed and anxious. For instance
, from a young, they pursue many options
for career paths which makes many younger children pressured and many expectations to have a good career. It can lead to people
becoming too overstressed and overwhelmed if they thought they missed out on their careers. Consequently
, this
can make young generations feel dissatisfied with their current choices.
In conclusion, having many options
in our aspect of life such
as food
types, fashion, lifestyle, and career path makes people
confused about what type they should choose which makes people
become anxious and overwhelmed if they are not satisfied with their choices.Submitted by dliyaa on
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coherence cohesion
Focus on organizing the essay logically. Improve the flow of ideas between paragraphs by using more transitional phrases, such as 'furthermore', 'in addition', or 'on the other hand'.
task achievement
Enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your main ideas. Make sure that your ideas are clearly explained and well-developed throughout the essay.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your claims. This will help in illustrating your points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion. It effectively sets the context at the beginning and summarizes the main points at the end.
task achievement
You address the task with a strong opinion and support your viewpoint with relevant ideas.