Eating too much sugar is harmful to health. Some people think it is the government’s responsibility to limit people’s sugar consumption, while others think it is an individual’s responsibility to limit the amount of sugar they eat. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#sugar #health #people #government’s #responsibility #limit #people’s #consumption #individual’s #amount

Nowadays, the obesity rate in South Korea has been increasing according to many statistics. The media started talking about what the

government

's role is to lower

people

sugar

consumption. Some activists even spoke in public that the national authorities should legislate against the increasing amount of

sugar

intake in order to handle the situation. There are

people

who are against the

government

's intervention, saying that it's a misusing the power of the

government

. They assert that what kind of foods they will eat should be chosen by themselves.

However

, it's said by many communities that the individual's responsibility is limited so the

government

needs to take an action to

change

the system of

society

. With the increasing number of fast food chains and the lifestyle of recent decades, it has been unavoidable for the public to have a distance from excessive amounts of

sugar

Hence

, it's necessary to

change

society

through the

government

instead

of speaking to an individual to take responsibility.

Furthermore

, some

people

insisted that the

tax

sugar

is inevitable to improve the current situation. It is important for citizens to have the right to choose what they want. Meanwhile, it's

also

the

government

's role to handle undesirable situations.

Hence

, the

government

must choose an indirect way to guide

people

to good diets.

For example

, they can charge a

sugar

tax

people

would choose healthier meals

instead

of sugary ones. By doing so,

people

will unconsciously decrease

sugar

consumption. There can be an argument that

this

tax

is for poor

people

However

, the

government

can reinvest the

tax

income to lower the

tax

rate for healthier meals. In conclusion, the

government

should take action to

change

society

instead

of letting

people

choose what they want to eat, not considering the

change

society

Submitted by seongminkr7 on Fri Jan 13 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

297 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

harmful
government intervention
policies and regulations
public health
individual responsibility
education and awareness campaigns
freedom of choice
balanced approach
food industry
sugar content
obesity
diabetes
health problems
taxation
advertising restrictions
labeling requirements
reading food labels
natural sweeteners
cooking at home
moderation
balanced diets

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Eating too much sugar is harmful to health. Some people think it is the government’s responsibility to limit people’s sugar consumption, while others think it is an individual’s responsibility to limit the amount of sugar they eat. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The subjects that children are taught in schools are decided by central authorities. Some people say that teachers, not politicians should be responsible for this task. To what extent do you agree or disagree with?

When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

easily. In addition, the city is central to the state, trade, education and many sectors of the human being so society tends to find new experiences and broaden their horizon in the metropolitan which supports people’s capability at work.

Nowadays, many people have to work longer hours, and they feel more stressed out than before. What are the reasons? What can employers do to make their employees' lives easier?

In many countries, people now living longer than before some people say that the aging population creates several problems for the government while others argue that there are benefits if society has more elderly people