Many believe that the best way to ensure a happier society is to reduce the difference in income earnings between the rich and poor. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#society #difference #income #earnings

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The whole happiness of

people

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is defined by numerous parameters. Today, I would like to point out one of them emphasising the

money

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topic.

Although

Linking Words

a wide amount of

people

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think that the gap between

people

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from different social classes should be smaller to bring

comfortable

Correct article usage

a comfortable

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environment. We are going to see the health aspect of

this

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possibility and

then

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the point surrounding the

money

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power fact.

First

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of all, we barely all know that extreme incomes for both rich and poor

people

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are unfortunately increasing.

This

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fact tends to bring a lack of healthcare support for a part of the population. I'm not talking about humans getting a huge amount of

money

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as I am pretty sure they can handle

this

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aspect and I am glad for them.

However

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, for

people

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from the bottom social class, it could be really hard to find a way out when diseases or health issues occur. The main problem is related to their income. In fact, those

people

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are struggling for eating every

day

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and they cannot afford medical assistance themselves

then

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On the other hand

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, citizens having a fortune in their bank account are able to enjoy their lives doing many things because they can pay for it . It could be spending time on holiday as well as much more memorable activities

such

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as a tour on a helicopter perhaps. Some other

people

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don't even know the existence of leisure and they spend their all life working hard all

day

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long until the body says stop. I mean, welfare could be completely different if

people

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could spend

money

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on activities for relaxing. To sum up, If I had to share my thoughts, I would say that it is kind of dramatic to see

such

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a wide difference between

people

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's capacities increasing

day

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day

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. I am sceptical about the future as things keep on going on the same way against all odds. I strongly believe that a fair balance between

people

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's income could help the whole society be happier.

Submitted by laniesse.sebastien on Sat Jan 14 2023

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

338 words

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Many believe that the best way to ensure a happier society is to reduce the difference in income earnings between the rich and poor. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or oganisation. Why might be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Some people think that governments in developing countries should introduce new technologies to people in order to improve the quality of life, while others believe that in order to achieve that governments should offer free education for all. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Some sports are considered extremely dangerous, but many people still like them. Why do people take part in dangerous sports? Give some suggestions on how to deal with these dangers.

Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do