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Band 7.5

PEOPLE WHO GO TO LIVE OTHER COUNTRIES, SHOULD FOLLOW THE CUSTOMS AND TRADITIONAL OF THE NEW COUNTRY. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

#people #countries #customs #country
In the modern world is a common trend for
people
 to move from their
country
 to a new one for a better future. As each
country
 has its own
culture
,
people
 have to adapt and respect it, but
this
 doesn't mean that they are forced to follow these customs and traditions. I believe that multi-
culture
 countries are the ones that develop better and are prejudiced-free, so I disagree with the statement above. Every human being has deeply ingrained some customs and traditions from their
country
 that are really difficult to change. If the person starts to follow the new
culture
 and totally forgets the previous one it means that he lost his
identity
. For many countries it is a way of an efficient integration process, to make migrants and immigrants forget their past. To underpin the previous argument, the following example can be provided. In Greece, a few decades ago, anyone that had kept their previous
identity
 together with the new greek one, was considered a foreigner.
Hence
,
culture
 is very important and a big part of every person's
identity
 that should not care about anyone except the actual person.
In addition
, I reckon that forcing
people
 to follow a
culture
 is evidence of a
country
 which doesn't accept diversity. As I see it, diversity is an instrumental factor in the well-being of society. That means that if
people
 are not able to be whomever they want they will never be fully integrated into the new
country
 and feel it as their home.
For instance
, if a Muslim moves to an orthodox
country
 and is forced to change religion, he would never feel
this
country
 as home and it's possible to move out again somewhere that he would be accepted.
Thus
, except for the emotional purposes, and different cultural acceptance, it's
also
 a sign of a developed
country
 with
people
 living freely. In conclusion, I believe that the customs and traditions of our home countries are the ones that sculpt our personal
identity
 and show the level of development and freedom that a
country
 offers to its citizens.
Submitted by tsouptsis on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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