some children spend hours every day on their smart phones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#children #hours #phones #case #development

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Nowadays, it has been seen that some

children

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are using their

phones

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more frequently and devoting most of their time to

this

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piece of equipment. In

this

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essay, I will outline underlying reasons contributing to

this

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phenomenon as well as bring some examples providing it is a negative change among

children

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. There are some potential causes leading to

children

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spending hours on their

phones

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First

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of all,

this

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apparatus provides a plethora of games for the

children

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by which they can be entertained. To be more precise, youngsters find it as a leisure pursuit in which they immerse themselves in numerous appealing video games without considering their drawbacks.

Secondly

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, it is due to the lack of parental supervision. More accurately, if the parents do not manage and restrict the time of using these technological devices,

children

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will continue to indulge themselves in playing since they are not well-trained about the value of time yet. An increasing number of

children

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are really addicted to their

phones

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these days which will create some irreversible consequences in their life. The

first

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and foremost drawback of excessive usage of

phones

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children

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is that it prevents them from other kinds of activities both recreational and educational ones. What I mean by the recreational factors is that because they are engaged in playing with their

phones

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they will lose enthusiasm for outdoor activities and playing other types of games with their peers.

As a result

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, after a while, they will experience isolation and will not become sociable. In terms of educational aspects, smartphones are becoming a device by which

children

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cringe away from their studies and homework.

In addition

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, spending hours on

phones

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will threaten their physical and mental health,

such

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as poor eyesight and depression. In a nutshell, there are plenty of measures causing

children

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to use their

phones

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for prolonged hours which I strongly believe that it is highly harmful for the young generation.

Submitted by z.rezayi1999 on Sun Jan 15 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

321 words

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some children spend hours every day on their smart phones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

: Some people think that people commit crime because of poverty and social problems, while others think it is because of their bad nature. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Many people think that increasing business and cultural contacts between countries is a positive development. However, others believe that these are leading to the loss of national identities. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

In future all cars will be driverless cars, in your opinion are advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Some people believe that climate change has the greatest effect on people’s way of life. Others believe the economy of the region has the greatest effect. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

the money spent by goverenment on space programmes would e better spent on vitl public services such asschool and hospitals.To what extend do you agree or disagree.