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Band 4.5

High Rise building - advantage/disadvantage These days more people prefer to live in vertical buildings. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the people?

#rise #advantage #people #buildings
Nowadays, everyone prefers to live in vertical
buildings
instead
 of building their own
land
 houses. As it is known,
land
 prices in cities have always been increasing over the years as the population increases simultaneously which causes the availability of
land
.
However
 , there are a few
advantages
 and disadvantages when we decide to live in high-rise
buildings
. A comprehensive analysis below would explain them.
To begin
 with,
people
 who live in
vertical
Add an article
the vertical
show examples
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
 have a few
advantages
.
For example
, they tend to be
more happy
Replace the words
happier
show examples
 because they have a chance to see an incredible view
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the height.
In addition
, they contribute to
reduce
Change the verb form
reducing
show examples
land
 prices as the
high rise
Add a hyphen
high-rise
show examples
buildings
 require less
land
 area than
land
 houses needed.
Therefore
, we should encourage
people
 to live more in vertical
buildings
 due to
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
advantages
.
In addition
, it has a few disadvantages.
For instance
, they are
who
Correct pronoun usage
those
show examples
living
Wrong verb form
live
show examples
 in vertical
buildings
more
Add a missing verb
are more
show examples
 likely take a long time to get out if an earthquake occurs due to its height.
Moreover
, if its elevators are under repair, they have to use stairs which for certain
people
 is not an easy thing to use
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
from
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 level to the ground.
Hence
, we should find a solution for these problems. To summarise, there are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advantages
 and disadvantages for
people
 who prefer to live in vertical
buildings
. All of those things are very
depend
Replace the word
dependent
show examples
 on our own personal needs and interests. I suggest
people
to
Remove the particle
apply
show examples
do
theirselves
Correct your spelling
themselves
show examples
 considerations before they live in high-rise
buildings
.
Submitted by fernindito.app on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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