Some people think that modern technology is making people more sociable, while others think it is making them less sociable. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
While some
people
are of the opinion that cutting-age
technology Correct the spelling
cutting-edge
making
Wrong verb form
makes
pwople
more sociable, whereas others think it Correct your spelling
people
is make
ng them less sociable. In my opinion, using Change the verb form
makes
technologies
makes Fix the agreement mistake
technology
people
less sociable and my eesay
will elaborate on Correct your spelling
essay
this
on
the following paragraphs.
In Change preposition
in
Correct article usage
the 21'st
21'st
century it is not a secret that new technologies become part of our life and we are using them almost Correct your spelling
21st
everyday
. Using them helps to communicate with friends, Replace the word
every day
collegous
or relatives whose Correct your spelling
colleagues
living
in different Replace the word
live
city
without leaving home. Fix the agreement mistake
cities
Moreover
it helps to make a friendship with strangers from all Add a comma
,Moreover
aroud
the world. Correct your spelling
around
For instance
, there are increasing
Add an article
an increasing
number
of applications that helps to text with others.
Change the article
a number
the number
On the other hand
, in spite of benefits
of using computers, phones Correct article usage
the benefits
people
do not notice the negative sides of its
. The major problem is Correct pronoun usage
it
stucking
behind the phones leads to Internet addiction, Correct your spelling
sticking
therefore
people
become less communicable. Moreover
, they might have bad relationships with friends or parents. To illustrate, it has been shown that people
aged 15~30 are most suffering from addiction to the Internet, because if that
they offer Correct word choice
apply
problem
of communication and health.
To conclude, a breakthrough in Fix the agreement mistake
problems
IT
sphere and Correct article usage
the IT
increasing
number of technologies making our life easier Correct article usage
an increasing
that
in the past, but Correct your spelling
than
people
do not detect drawbacks that outweigh good
sides.Correct article usage
the good
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite