IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

People today are spending more and more time outside of the home. What are the reasons for this trend? What effects is it having on individuals and society?

#people #time #home #trend #effects #individuals #society
The lifestyle has
signicantly
Correct your spelling
significantly
 changed
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to
previous
Add an article
the previous
show examples
 decade,
people
 are spending more time
time
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
ourside
Correct your spelling
outside
 of their homes now.
The
Correct your spelling
They
show examples
 are
multipule
Correct your spelling
multiple
 factors that lead to
this
 trend which has made
impacts
Fix the agreement mistake
impact
show examples
 on not only
individuls
Correct your spelling
individuals
 but
also
 our society. The change of
of
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
working
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
 is one of the aspects worth to be mentioned. In the previous century,
people
 own their only lands,
thus
 they are able to plant vegetables and raise
cattles
Correct your spelling
cattle
 for their own supplies at home,
however
, now the majority of
people
 work for establishments which usually require the employee to attend to
Correct article usage
the compnay
show examples
compnay
Correct your spelling
company
comply
.
Additionally
, the development of public transportation in comparison to the old days provides more convenience to travel
also
Correct word choice
and also
show examples
 motivates
people
 to go out.
As a result
 of
this
 trend,
people
 today may have less sense of belonging to
thier
Correct your spelling
their
the
 home, and
this
 may cause unstable
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
 between family members.
The
Correct your spelling
They
show examples
 are studies indicating that the
divoce
Correct your spelling
divorce
 rate today is significantly
hight
Correct your spelling
high
show examples
 than
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 past decades.
Furthere
Correct your spelling
Further
 more,
Submitted by nonam224 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: