IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

In many countries, some people earn very high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country. Others believe that the government should not allow people to earn salaries above a certain level. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#countries #people #salaries #country #government #level
In every part of the world, there is various economic system in which the government get benefit from wealthy individuals by earning tax. In fact, others said that the stakeholder should control and set a maximum standard for the citizen outcome. In
this
 essay, I will elaborate on both viewpoints as well as my personal perspective towards why it is crucial to propose the idea of letting
people
 earn extremely high pay. Many individuals believe that obtaining super high earnings is everyone’s dream,
therefore
people
 are becoming more competitive to get it.
This
 trend,
therefore
, can bring advantages to
society
 as there is an obligation for millionaires to pay taxes. The tax earned by the rich can be beneficial for improving some sectors
such
 as developing educational facilities, increasing health access, and establishing public transportation. In the end, the millionaires not only prosper themselves but
also
 everyone in
society
.
On the other hand
,
people
 think that it is essential for the government to set a rule that restricts
people
’s income to a certain level as it will bring benefits too.
Such
 restrictions are believed to decrease the gap between the rich and the poor.
Therefore
, minimizing the gap will decrease the crime rates as
people
 have almost the same amount of wage.
This
 regulation
hence
 will help
society
 to live more peacefully as there is no more a tendency to steal from the rich because one might not feel hard enough to live their life. In conclusion,
people
 who earn high wages can contribute to supporting the economy of a country by paying taxes. Meanwhile, when there is a rule for controlling the citizen's income will decrease criminal activity in a particular country. In my point of view, it will be more significant for letting the rich be what they should be since it brings more good for giving advantage to
society
.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: