Most people think that government should invest money in improving the quality of life in earth rather than exploring space. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Nowadays, exploration of the galaxy is becoming more popular in many
countries
compared to spending money on quality of life. I am inclined to partially agree with the notion that governments should spend more investment on Earth
.
On the one hand, there is a strong linkage between space
and the earth
. Although
space
is an unlimited place and it is extremely difficult to learn this
knowledge specifically, explorations are being continued by governments in order to define a planet where there are a number of resources for living in the foreseeable future. Additionally
, when they can find any unknown planet, investigators can control that planet. Furthermore
, the world`s population is increasing day
by day
and this
can be a valid concern for countries
.
I, on the other hand
, believe that the exploration of the galaxy does not necessarily guarantee more profit. As a matter of fact, it can be detrimental to citizens who live on earth
since,
they have a tendency to live and it is becoming difficult Remove the comma
apply
day
by day
on earth
. For instance
, there are more than enough people who are homeless and poor individuals who face starvationAdd the comma(s)
, as well as humans,
as well as
humans are suffering painless death and diseases in Africa and other poor countries
around the world. Therefore
, governments should not overlook them and if they expand investment on the earth
for the current life of individuals instead
of space
, it will instil
enhance a higher standard of living.
Verb problem
apply
To conclude
, though exploring space
can sometimes help measure problems, the financial status of countries
needs more for individuals and the earth
.Submitted by muhammadrizoabduxalimov017 on
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task achievement
While your essay presents a clear stance on the topic, it could benefit from more detailed examples to support your arguments. Consider incorporating specific instances or data that reinforce your views on the importance of investing on Earth rather than space exploration.
coherence cohesion
Your essay maintains a good structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, using a wider variety of linking words and transitions can improve the flow between ideas and sections, enhancing overall coherence.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are supported, but to strengthen your argument, elaborate more on each point. Expanding on the reasons behind your stance with more depth can make your essay more persuasive and engaging.