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Band 4

If you could make one important change in a school that you attended, what change would you make? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.

#change #school #support
nowadays, in university, pupils have to learn unnecessary subjects. if I could change one
the
Correct article usage
apply
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thing there absolutely remove that from their schedule in
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I will support my view with examples
firstly
, these subjects take a long
time
 in the semester and it seems to waste student's
time
therefore
 they can't focus on mandatory studies.
instead
 of that student would be in the lab and they would get experience.
for example
 when I was a student I had to pass some course that it was not important for the future
such
 as Islamic history
secondly
, crossing out some unnecessary study not only save
time
moreover
 save money, a thing that everyone knows financial issues are important as well as
time
,
in
addition
Add the comma(s)
,addition
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 if we have financial issues we won't concentrate on studying correctly. many studies have shown that to conclude, the basis of my view is based on many reasons I make changes in some courses if I could.
Submitted by mahyarnaseri on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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