IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

Working abroad can help employees earn a great deal of money and gain more benefits. However, some people think this trend has many negative impacts. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#employees #money #gain #people #trend #impacts
The charts display the
quantity
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of females per 100 males in all degrees of education. Overall, it can be seen that at the three various stages of schooling the number of students in developed
countries
 almost reached the targets, while developing
countries
 went far from the goals with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time.
It is interesting to note that in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
elementary
education
Add a comma
,education
show examples
 the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of girls in developing nations reached 83 students in 1990 and 87 in 2000, meanwhile
industrialized
Change preposition
in industrialized
show examples
countries
 females’ school enrolment was quite higher, during the
then-year
Correct your spelling
ten-year
show examples
 period the number of pupils rose from 93 to 96 girls of the total. The secondary school female statistic shows that the figure
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 girls was gradually increasing from 1990 to 2000 in both types of
goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
.
For instance
, there were 72 students in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poor
countries
 and 98 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wealthy ones in
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
1990. The average
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
high school education was significantly higher than others.
However
, even if developed
countries
 could reach a certain aim,
moreover
 they went far beyond
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the frames, emergent nations felt the rapid decrease, followed by a rise in the difference between states
Submitted by rizamaliqyzy on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Professional growth
  • Cultural shock
  • Remittances
  • Global networking
  • Expatriate
  • Brain drain
  • Reverse culture shock
  • Cross-cultural communication
  • Exploitation
  • Professional migration
  • Economic benefits
  • Bilateral agreements
What to do next:
Look at other essays: