IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people say that spending the national budget on space exploration is a waste of resources. They insist that those funds should be spent on people living on earth. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #budget #space #exploration #waste #resources #funds #earth
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We are living in an advanced world. People's lives
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 become more sophisticated in terms of standard of living
what
Correct word choice
than
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 used to be earlier because of the development in the field of research and science.
However
Linking Words
, there is
notion
Add an article
a notion
the notion
show examples
 among some folks that
instead
Linking Words
 of allocating the country fund
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 astronomy research, those funds should
utilise
Add a missing verb
be utilise
show examples
 on pupils residing on earth. I
am not firmly agree
Change the verb form
do not firmly agree
show examples
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
this
Linking Words
 and my perspective
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
Linking Words
 will be outlined in the following paragraphs. To commence with, I would like to say that with the introduction of various
life saving
Add a hyphen
life-saving
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 drugs in the field of medical death rates in people
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 reduced significantly as compared to what
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 used to be some decades ago.
As a result
Linking Words
, many countries are facing problems related to overpopulation which has become a burning issue nowadays that needs to be addressed. With the increase in
population
Add a comma
,population
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 the demand
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 utilising natural
resources
Use synonyms
 is at
alarming
Add an article
an alarming
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 rate,
therefore
Linking Words
 many of the national
resources
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as water,
wood
Add an article
the wood
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 used for paper making across the globe
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 depleting.
Money
Add an article
The money
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 financed to space exploration agencies will help
astronaut
Add an article
the astronaut
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 to explore other planets in the universe and get to know about the possibility of life there. There was
a recent news
Remove the article
recent news
a piece of recent news
show examples
 that popped up in the international media
channals
Correct your spelling
channels
 which stated that NASA has found various evidence of
resources
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 necessary for
Add an article
the
show examples
survival of human
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 Mars planet during its universe exploration. On the flip side, My argument is
weekend
Correct your spelling
weakened
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 by the fact that how could a country think and use
hard earned
Add a hyphen
hard-earned
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 money of its people
into
Change preposition
for
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 expensive research programs
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
 pupils give taxes to
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 so that government can use it for developing their quality of life by providing them with certain benefits
such
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 as health facilities, developing infrastructure, free education etc. To conclude, space exploration should be encouraged by
government
Add an article
the government
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 to find
solution
Add an article
a solution
the solution
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 to the depletion of
resources
Use synonyms
 but at the same
time
Add a comma
,time
show examples
 it should
also
Linking Words
imposed
Change the verb form
impose
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 certain strict laws
such
Linking Words
 as one child
one
Correct word choice
and one
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parents
Change to a singular noun
parent
show examples
 should have can reduce the hazards
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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