Write a letter to your friend who lives in an another country and in your letter: a. Invite him/her to a public event in your country. b. Describe the public event c. Explain about other plans you have or your friend when he/she will visit.

#friend #lives #country #event #b #c #plans #visit

Dear Suzanne, I hope you are hale and hearty. How is the weather? I am writing

this

letter in

regards

Fix the agreement mistake

regard

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invite

Wrong verb form

inviting

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you to India for

Ganpati

Festival.

Ganpati

festival's celebration

begans

Correct your spelling

begins

began

on 10th September. It is celebrated for 10 days. I remember we were discussing how you like Marathi

music

and

dance

. Throughout

this

festival, you will be able to witness different forms of Marathi

music

and

dance

. So, I am excited to invite you

for

Change preposition

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this

festival. I would like to give you more information about

this

festival.

Ganpati

is Hindu God and

this

festival is to bring

Ganpati

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your home or in the building to pray for peace and well-being of the families and country.

Ganpati

is considered

Change preposition

apply

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the humble, kind and yet strongest God so

people

pray to be like him. All

the

Correct article usage

apply

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10 days are celebratory but 1st and

last

day

Fix the agreement mistake

days

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are

the

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grand celebration.

People

bring gigantic

music

systems or bands or DJs to

dance

and enjoy Marathi

music

and

dance

Therefore

, you will hear

music

and see

people

dancing in happiness all over Mumbai.

Additionally

people

distribute various types of sweets which are specially made for only

this

festival. My

favorite

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favourite

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sweet is `Malai modak` - which is very similar to

Correct article usage

the Kismi

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Kismi

Correct your spelling

Kimi

candy we used to have a lot during our childhood. While you visit, I insist you stay at my place. My house is located in Borivali which is one of the prime locations for the

Ganpati

festival.

Additionally

, we will go around Mumbai to see various famous places like Gateway of India, Haji Ali mosque,

Marine

Correct word choice

and Marine

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drive and eat a lot of different street foods. All these spots are pretty near to my place, so

commute

Correct article usage

the commute

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will be easy. I am very excited by the idea of you visiting for

this

festival. Looking forward to

hear

Change the verb form

hearing

show examples

a positive reply from you. Take care, Nidhi

Submitted by samvid95 on Thu Jan 19 2023

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

315 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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