IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that kids today are more protected than earlier generations. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this view?

Some people believe that
children
Use synonyms
 are well safer than the previous generations. I agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement to some extent because of a few reasons.
Children
Use synonyms
 are more secure today than earlier to some extent due to several reasons.
Firstly
Linking Words
, parents are more aware of the future of
children
Use synonyms
 because of education.
In addition
Linking Words
, kids are provided quality education and greater health than in previous times due to the parent's disposable income.
for example
Linking Words
, the government ensured education and various health program for the welfare of its younger population.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the number of
children
Use synonyms
 per person is lower than earlier which increases the chance of more attention and care to the limited number of
children
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, offspring are safer than in earlier because of the big family.heir feels more secure and safe in the joint family due to the higher number of members of the family. They got emotional support and companionship in
an enormous family sizes
Correct the article-noun agreement
enormous family sizes
an enormous family size
show examples
.scion can share their worries and concerns with family members if their parents are busy.They feel less stressed and are sedentary because of the interaction with other family members.
For example
Linking Words
, I feel more relaxed and happier in my childhood days in a joint family, but my cousin feels lonely in her nuclear family. So, offspring are safer and happier than the previous generation. In conclusion, even though
children
Use synonyms
 are important in today's world, I believe that they are safer and more content in earlier times.

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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