Some people believe that kids today are more protected than earlier generations. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this view?

#people #kids #generations

Some people believe that

children

are well safer than the previous generations. I agree with

this

statement to some extent because of a few reasons.

Children

are more secure today than earlier to some extent due to several reasons.

Firstly

, parents are more aware of the future of

children

because of education.

In addition

, kids are provided quality education and greater health than in previous times due to the parent's disposable income.

for example

, the government ensured education and various health program for the welfare of its younger population.

Moreover

, the number of

children

per person is lower than earlier which increases the chance of more attention and care to the limited number of

children

On the other hand

, offspring are safer than in earlier because of the big family.heir feels more secure and safe in the joint family due to the higher number of members of the family. They got emotional support and companionship in

an enormous family sizes

Correct the article-noun agreement

enormous family sizes

an enormous family size

show examples

.scion can share their worries and concerns with family members if their parents are busy.They feel less stressed and are sedentary because of the interaction with other family members.

For example

, I feel more relaxed and happier in my childhood days in a joint family, but my cousin feels lonely in her nuclear family. So, offspring are safer and happier than the previous generation. In conclusion, even though

children

are important in today's world, I believe that they are safer and more content in earlier times.

Submitted by geenajohn82 on Thu Jan 19 2023

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

243 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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