Some working parents believe childcare centers can provide best care for children, while others think family members like grandparents can do it better. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Although
Linking Words
it is common that working parents to place their kids who are pre-school age in kindergarten, some others criticize and argue that their children will receive a better level of care with their relatives. From my perspective, I strongly support putting our offspring in daycare facilities. Those that support babysitting through grandparents cite several reasons for
this
Linking Words
.
First
Linking Words
, they claim that
this
Linking Words
is the safest option due to the fact that they are family members so they can be trusted and will put the safety and health of their kids
first
Linking Words
. Another consideration is the cost. there would be a huge cost for placing their kids in kindergarten.
Moreover
Linking Words
, young couples are already under heavy financial strains,
such
Linking Words
as mortgages, high gas prices and so on. With the help of family, it could save considerable expenses monthly and will ease their living burdens obviously.
For example
Linking Words
, the average spending of a preschool child in daycare centres is approximately 30,000RMB per year in China. Despite the benefits of using family members to care for their children, it has many advantages to put them in daycare centres.
First
Linking Words
, the staff in childcare are well trained, qualified, and professional with early childhood education so that they can care for them well as well as help them develop creative, learning skills by painting, singing, and playing games. the
second
Linking Words
advantage is that they can learn how to get along with and socialize with their friends and teachers and they will be more confident and sociable later. In conclusion, I deem that the advantages of using kindergarten outweigh the benefits of using relatives,
this
Linking Words
is because the environment of the babysitting facilities they were brought up in will help them cultivate creative, sociable, confident personalities.
Submitted by jinyuming896 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: