Young people are leaving their homes in rural areas to work or study in cities. What are the reasons? Do the advantages of this development outweigh the drawbacks?
Some humans leave their houses in simple areas to get a higher education in modern
cities
. It is wonderful to visit the city
to work
and learn. It was essential to get the best job and school in the city
. In this
essay, the two points view
will be argued.
The initial one to consider is that many reasons to leave their homes. Change preposition
of view
Moreover
, when we study
in modern cities
, we can get a higher education and be more comfortable. In other words
, many young people
work
in the city
because it is basic, and more comfortable and feel over the moon
. In addition
, humans work
in the best city
to get a high salary their feel over the moon
. A study
published by New York University concluded that 90% of citizens work
in modern companies to improve themselves and get a lot of money. For example
, when we work
very well, we can get comfortable, better moody, big salary of people
.
On the other hand
, some people
believe that studying in a city
has disadvantages . First of all, there is a cost in the modern cities
to study
there. Furthermore
, boys and girls don't have experience in communicating with other people
. For example
, if we go to other cities
to work
, we should spend the cost of living at home. Also
, humans who work
in other countries miss family and friends. Therefore
, people
should study
in their areas to assist poor children to learn new things and fall over the moon
.
In conclusion, more and more people
think that getting high work
in a big city
a great for them in life. From my own personal point of view, a lot of people
need more information about leaving another city
. It is better to exchange our experience about this
issue. If we get high study
, we will get experience. People
should use amazing work
to feel over the moon
.Submitted by shaikhaalrashidi24 on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay presents some relevant points, but it would benefit from a clearer structure and stronger linkage between ideas. Try to organize your essay in a more logical manner and use linking words more effectively.
task achievement
Your essay covers the task requirements, but make sure to develop your ideas more fully. Include more detailed examples to support your points and provide a more comprehensive response.
task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that your main points are well supported. Avoid repetition and strive for more precision in your explanations.
task achievement
You have a strong understanding of the topic and have attempted to address both the reasons for young people moving to cities and the advantages and disadvantages of this trend.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has an introduction and conclusion, which is essential to a good essay structure.