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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#spite #advances #agriculture #people #world #case
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After the technological boosts in
agricultural
Add an article
the agricultural
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 industry, there are
people
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 who still cannot feed themselves all over the world. In my opinion, many factors can cause a lack of
food
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, and we require different strategies to tackle
with
Change preposition
apply
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this
Linking Words
 problem. Technological developments can't solve the
food
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 problem once and for all. Usually, an advanced invention happens in a developed
country
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, not a developing
country
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, but the
food
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 shortage often exists in a developing
country
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. In
this
Linking Words
 case, the advanced yields in the agriculture industry are unable to reach the needy population. For developing
countries
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, the cost of importing
food
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 can largely
over
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be over
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 their budgets. The final result is that
people
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 in these
countries
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 are still starving, while
people
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 from
developed
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the developed
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 world wasting their
food
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.
Furthermore
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, the root reasons for
a
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apply
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famine can be the poor quality of the soil, lack of water, extreme weather condition, and so on, which are still uncurable today. As to the actions we can take to mitigate the
food
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 problem, here are several possible suggestions.
Firstly
Linking Words
, developed
countries
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 that have an advanced agriculture system
shoud
Correct your spelling
should
 launch international aid for
people
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 in need around the world.
For instance
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,
countries
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 with advanced high-tech tools should send their top scientists to help a
country
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 that
sufferd
Correct your spelling
suffered
suffers
 from
food
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 shortage with its agricultural equipment and natural resources.
Secondly
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, we can set up a charitable organization to raise money for those starving
people
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, and send the
food
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 to their homes.
Finally
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, the whole human species should regardless of its discrepancies and keep developing agricultural science at the same time. In conclusion, with the fact that many
people
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 are under starvation in
a
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an
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 advanced agriculture background, we need to find out the root reason for
food
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 shortage -
that is
Linking Words
 the resources
not
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are not
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 in the right places- and act like a union to help
starving
Correct article usage
the starving
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 population
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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feed themselves.
Submitted by mnisjojo on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • inequality
  • distribution
  • access to resources
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • political factors
  • economic factors
  • agricultural practices
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • population growth
  • education
  • knowledge
  • food waste
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