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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#spite #advances #agriculture #people #world #case
After the technological boosts in
agricultural
Add an article
the agricultural
show examples
 industry, there are
people
 who still cannot feed themselves all over the world. In my opinion, many factors can cause a lack of
food
, and we require different strategies to tackle
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
 problem. Technological developments can't solve the
food
 problem once and for all. Usually, an advanced invention happens in a developed
country
, not a developing
country
, but the
food
 shortage often exists in a developing
country
. In
this
 case, the advanced yields in the agriculture industry are unable to reach the needy population. For developing
countries
, the cost of importing
food
 can largely
over
Add a missing verb
be over
show examples
 their budgets. The final result is that
people
 in these
countries
 are still starving, while
people
 from
developed
Correct article usage
the developed
show examples
 world wasting their
food
.
Furthermore
, the root reasons for
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
famine can be the poor quality of the soil, lack of water, extreme weather condition, and so on, which are still uncurable today. As to the actions we can take to mitigate the
food
 problem, here are several possible suggestions.
Firstly
, developed
countries
 that have an advanced agriculture system
shoud
Correct your spelling
should
 launch international aid for
people
 in need around the world.
For instance
,
countries
 with advanced high-tech tools should send their top scientists to help a
country
 that
sufferd
Correct your spelling
suffered
suffers
 from
food
 shortage with its agricultural equipment and natural resources.
Secondly
, we can set up a charitable organization to raise money for those starving
people
, and send the
food
 to their homes.
Finally
, the whole human species should regardless of its discrepancies and keep developing agricultural science at the same time. In conclusion, with the fact that many
people
 are under starvation in
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 advanced agriculture background, we need to find out the root reason for
food
 shortage -
that is
 the resources
not
Add a missing verb
are not
show examples
 in the right places- and act like a union to help
starving
Correct article usage
the starving
show examples
 population
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
feed themselves.
Submitted by mnisjojo on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • inequality
  • distribution
  • access to resources
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • political factors
  • economic factors
  • agricultural practices
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • population growth
  • education
  • knowledge
  • food waste
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