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Writing Samples
Band 6

Despite a variety of sport facilities and gyms, people are less fit nowadays than ever before. What do you think are the main causes of this problem? What solutions can you suggest?

#variety #sport #facilities #gyms #people
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Nowadays, the range of
sports
Use synonyms
 facilities and
gyms
Use synonyms
 increased dramatically, but
people
Use synonyms
 are less fit than ever before. I believe exploring the cause of
this
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 problem can assist in finding suitable solutions to help resolve it. The price of registration in
gyms
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 and
sports
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 centres has escalated rapidly.
Thus
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, it could pretty much account for
people
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 rather stay home and not use those
sports
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 facilities. In my view,
governments
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 should reduce the cost of registration for
people
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 and
also
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 can offer vouchers for a wide range of
sports
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 centres.
Moreover
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,
people
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 indulge in eating processed food.
Therefore
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,
governments
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 should encourage
people
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 to go on a diet and limit eating processed food.
People
Use synonyms
 are restricted by busy schedules, so they do not have enough time to go to
gyms
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. It can
also
Linking Words
 explain why
people
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 are unwilling to go to
sports
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 centres. The government should encourage
people
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 to do some exercise by themselves on a regular basis and burn off some calories at home.
Also
Linking Words
,
governments
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 should raise public awareness about the adverse of a sedentary lifestyle and its connection with increased health risks. To conclude, even though gym memberships are expensive now and
people
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 are restricted by busy schedules contributes to
people
Use synonyms
 becoming fatter and doing less exercise than before.
Governments
Use synonyms
 can help remedy the situation. In my opinion, the government should reduce memberships cost and offer free vouchers for
gyms
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 to increase wiling of
people
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 to use
sports
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 facilities and
also
Linking Words
 should raise public awareness about the positive effects of workouts and these are positive steps to resolve
this
Linking Words
 problem.
Submitted by melika.verdi on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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