IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #teenagers #community #work #time #benefit
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Teenager
Add an article
The teenager
A teenager
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 is one of the most valuable age groups
in
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with
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 respect to
upgrade
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upgrading
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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social values as
teenagers
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 are
future
Correct article usage
the future
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 of
country’s
Correct article usage
the country’s
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 development. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will explore that
teenagers
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 should do
community
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work
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 for free in their leisure
time
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 which would ultimately
beneficial
Add a missing verb
be beneficial
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 for both the
teenagers
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 and the
community
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. I believe it is everyone’s duty to do
work
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 for the betterment of society.
However
Linking Words
, other than
teenagers
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, other age groups are quite busy
in
Change preposition
with
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 jobs and
family’s
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family
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 responsibilities,
usually
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,usually
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 they do not have much
time
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 to spend on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
community
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work
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
teenagers
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 have enough
time
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 to explore new ideas and
work
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 on them to help the
community
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 and as
Add an article
a teenager
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Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
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teenager
Add a comma
,teenager
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 they do not have
the
Correct article usage
apply
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financial issues as they have their parent’s support, so they can
work
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 for free easily.
Along with
Linking Words
 that, their
work
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 must be appreciated with
the
Correct article usage
apply
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time
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 so they can keep themselves motivated to help the
community
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.
Moreover
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
community related
Add a hyphen
community-related
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work
Use synonyms
 would help them in the growth of their career because they will get a chance to learn plenty of new things as they have started working from a young age. So by the
time
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, they are adults they would have enough knowledge about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society and most importantly, they would get a chance to interact with different
people
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 which could lead them to understand
different
Change the article
a different
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kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
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 of
people
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.
Additionally
Linking Words
, they can develop the confidence to talk to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people
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 without any hesitation. Despite these facts, many
people
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 believe that
teenagers
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 should be paid well for any kind of
work
Use synonyms
 they do because no
work
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 should be done for free. It is
valid
Correct article usage
a valid
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point
Add the particle
to point
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 up to some extent, but when we look at
bigger
Add an article
the bigger
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 picture it ends up in unhealthy
competitions
Fix the agreement mistake
competition
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 and politics among
teenagers
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. In conclusion, I believe it should be
individual’s
Correct article usage
an individual’s
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 choice whether they want to
work
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 for free or want to charge for doing any
community
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by pcncu166 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • required
  • unpaid
  • community work
  • benefit
  • teenagers
  • life skills
  • volunteering
  • empathy
  • compassion
  • socially aware
  • responsible
  • interact
  • diverse backgrounds
  • cultural understanding
  • tolerance
  • work experience
  • essential skills
  • employment
  • interests
  • passions
  • career development
  • contribute
  • betterment
  • development
  • local community
  • mental well-being
  • stress
  • self-esteem
  • burden
  • academic
  • personal lives
  • time management
  • support
  • balance
  • participate
  • encouraged
  • numerous benefits
  • individuals
  • conclusion
What to do next:
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