IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Teleworking has been on the increase in recent years. Do you think this is a negative or postive development ?

Teleworking
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Punctuation problem
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 A Positive or Negative Development? In recent years, teleworking has become increasingly common
due to
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 advances in technology and changes in working patterns.
While
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 some people believe that working from home has certain disadvantages, I consider teleworking to be a largely positive development because it offers flexibility and improves quality of life. On the one hand, teleworking can have several drawbacks. One major disadvantage is the lack of direct communication between employees and their colleagues. Working in an office allows people to exchange ideas more easily and build stronger professional relationships.
In contrast
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, teleworkers may feel isolated and disconnected from their teams.
In addition
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, working from home can reduce productivity for some individuals because there are more distractions,
such
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 as household responsibilities or entertainment.
On the other hand
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, teleworking provides significant benefits for both employees and employers.
Firstly
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, working from home saves commuting time, which reduces stress and allows workers to spend more time with their families.
This
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 can lead to a better balance between work and personal life.
Secondly
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, companies can reduce expenses
such
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 as office rent and transportation costs.
Furthermore
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, teleworking can reduce traffic congestion and air pollution, which benefits the environment. In my opinion, teleworking is a positive development because its advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
Although
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 some workers may experience isolation, modern communication technology makes it easier to stay connected with colleagues. The flexibility and convenience offered by teleworking make it an effective and sustainable working arrangement. In conclusion, teleworking has both positive and negative aspects.
However
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, the benefits, including improved work-life balance and reduced costs, make teleworking a beneficial trend in modern society.

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task response
Add more strong, clear ideas for each point with specific facts or numbers.
coherence
Make topic sentences for each paragraph to show the main idea.
coherence
Use more linking words to connect ideas smoothly.
tone
Reduce repetition of phrases and keep a steady stance.
content
Clear position on teleworking is stated in the introduction and conclusion.
structure
There are both sides shown and a balance in view.
strength
Some good examples (time saved, cost, environment) support the view.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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