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Band 3.5

Some people believe that violent media directly results in violent behavior. To what ecpend do you agree or disagree?

#people #media #results #behavior #ecpend
In
this
 modern
society
,
media
 directly use violent
contect
Correct your spelling
contact
content
 to get viewership.
This
cause
Change the verb form
causes
show examples
 violent
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
. Part of the
poplutation
Correct your spelling
population
agree
Change the verb form
agrees
show examples
 with
above
Add an article
the above
show examples
 point,
while
otheres
Correct your spelling
others
 disagree. My point is, there is an impact on violent
media
. In
this
 essay, I'll be discussing my opinion.
Firstly
, there is no
media
 ethics in
current
Add an article
the current
show examples
media
 industry.
As for
Change preposition
For
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
example, a boy killed her girlfriend in a park recently in Sri Lanka.
This
 was the main headline of all
media
 platforms. they reported
Correct article usage
the insident
show examples
insident
Correct your spelling
incident
 in detail. How he
prepraed
Correct your spelling
prepared
 and how he purchased a knife and how he killed her. They didn't use any sort of filters to
blure
Correct your spelling
blur
 the backgrounds.
This
 type
news
Change preposition
of news
show examples
 directly
cause
Change the verb form
causes
show examples
 violent
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
.
secondly
, social
media
 is the other platform. People get bullied and get depressed
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
facebook
Change the capitalization
Facebook
show examples
,
whatsapp
Change the capitalization
Whatsapp
WhatsApp
show examples
 and
instagram
Change the capitalization
Instagram
show examples
. Especially, women and children get
harrased
Correct your spelling
harassed
. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
example,some pretty girls love to share
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
 sexy
pictureS
Correct your spelling
pictures
show examples
. But
media
Correct article usage
the media
show examples
 use these to insult them and they
lable
Correct your spelling
label
 them as sluts and they spread hate speech about them,
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
cause
Change the verb form
causes
show examples
 them to get
suside
Correct your spelling
outside
subside
. In conclusion, violent
media
 influence
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
violent
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
.
According to
 my point of view
media
Correct article usage
the media
show examples
 should have their own
resposibility
Correct your spelling
responsibility
 to
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
 a better
society
.
Therefore
 they need to report the news
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
much
Correct article usage
a much
show examples
 more appropriate manner.
Submitted by murph on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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