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Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people believe that countries should invite foreign companies to open their brunches, offices and factories in order to develop their economies. Others think countries should invest in their own companies instead. Discuss both view and give your opinions.

#people #countries #companies #brunches #offices #factories #economies
Nowadays, it is believed that many
countries
 ought to promote outside
firms
 for coming and opening branches, franchises,
agencies
Correct word choice
and agencies
show examples
 in order to get
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
financial
grown
Replace the word
growth
show examples
, on the other side, an increasing number of people believe that authorities must give tailored
fund
Fix the agreement mistake
funds
show examples
 to their national brands. Personally, I think that national
companies
 should be encouraged and funded by
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 for some root reasons.
In
Change preposition
To
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 commence with, there are some benefits to come foreign
firms
. When they start working demanding country, they are likely to pursue
competitive
Correct article usage
a competitive
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 environment
as well as
 innovations. Goods can
be compete
Change the verb form
compete
show examples
due to
 their prices whilst foreign
companies
increasing
Wrong verb form
increase
show examples
 steadily on the rise.
Furthermore
, they can make so many innovations in these
countries
.
Thus
, in
country
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the country
show examples
 could be created new technology, and it makes much more
benefit
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
developing
countries
.
On the other hand
, it is cited that authorities should
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
take care of
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
companies
. It means that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 they have to help them for some
reasons
Fix the agreement mistake
reason
show examples
.
Main
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The main
show examples
 reason is that they can make worldwide national brands. National
companies
 that acquire any aid,
such
 as
Correct article usage
a license
show examples
license
Fix the agreement mistake
licenses
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that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
related to
decrease
Change the verb form
decreasing
show examples
tax’s
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tax
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rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
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 or giving fund improve their quality and have a chance to open the world and represent
country
Add an article
the country
a country
show examples
 and its interests.
Moreover
, goods that are produced by local
firms
 should not be obliged to pay
custom’s
Change noun form
customs
show examples
 taxes. In
this
 case,
price
Add an article
the price
show examples
 can be set up less than
Correct article usage
the foreigner
show examples
foreigner
Replace the word
foreign
show examples
 ones. That situation
inspire
Change the verb form
inspires
show examples
 authorities to
be tend
Change the verb form
tend
show examples
 to give financial support to local
firms
,
thus
countries
 can perish economically
dependence
Replace the word
dependent
show examples
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
countries
Change noun form
country's
countries'
show examples
firms
as well as
 vanish to rely on
foreigner
Replace the word
foreign
show examples
 products. In conclusion, for improving
countries
’ economies, people have opposed opinions related to courage
companies
, I think,
favors
Change the spelling
favours
show examples
 can be much more if government support their own
firms
.
Submitted by niftaliyeva_aysel on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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