IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Many people think that fast food companies should not be allowed to advertise while others believe that all companies should have the right to advertise. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #food #companies #right
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Today, In our modern life , advertising become necessary for any company in any category for marketing
products
Use synonyms
 and services
such
Linking Words
 as fast
food
Use synonyms
companies
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 many
people
Use synonyms
 believe that fast
food
Use synonyms
 entities should not be allowed to advertise, others think that all
companies
Use synonyms
 should have the right to advertise . In my opinion, I consider that
companies
Use synonyms
 should advertise healthy
food
Use synonyms
 rather than fast
food
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that freedom of choice is the key principle of a democratic society. Now fast-
food
Use synonyms
companies
Use synonyms
 advertise a variety of their
products
Use synonyms
 with additional choices for their favourite
products
Use synonyms
. With advertising
people
Use synonyms
 would be able to make informed choices,
for example
Linking Words
, when I make an order from fast
food
Use synonyms
 company
such
Linking Words
 as KFC I can tell the employee about if my order has been spicy taste or normal and any elements that I want to add to my order. Nowadays, many fast-
food
Use synonyms
products
Use synonyms
 have a diet version which collected between a delicious taste and healthy
food
Use synonyms
 to attract
people
Use synonyms
 who considered healthy
food
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as advertising for keto diet meals as another version of the same product.
This
Linking Words
 can help
companies
Use synonyms
 achieve a balance equation between fast
food
Use synonyms
 and healthy
food
Use synonyms
 .
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is often believed that it is better that fast
food
Use synonyms
 is unhealthy and advertising it is irresponsible. New studies have shown a clear link between the regular consumption of fast
food
Use synonyms
 and obesity.
people
Use synonyms
 think that they need more information about how to eat balanced and healthy
food
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, there is no need to advertise fast
food
Use synonyms
 because it already exists everywhere in the school canteen, in supermarkets and in the high street . Every day we find new fast
food
Use synonyms
products
Use synonyms
 advertised by
companies
Use synonyms
 to attract a major of customers but advertising should encourage
people
Use synonyms
 to keep fit not to run their health . In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 may vary in their opinions, I think that effective advertising helps us understand the difference between fast
food
Use synonyms
 and healthy
food
Use synonyms
 and the effect of those on our bodies.
Submitted by a.solyman85 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: