IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Children educating is expensive. In some countries, the government pays partly or all education fees. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#children #countries #government #education #fees
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Now a days
Correct the word
Nowadays
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 education is
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
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unaffordable in
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 nations but
regime
Correct article usage
the regime
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providing
Wrong verb form
provides
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 help to pay
study
Change preposition
for study
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 expenses which is
very
Correct article usage
a very
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appriciatable
Correct your spelling
appreciable
appreciatable
 step for
growth
Correct article usage
the growth
show examples
 and development of
certain
Add an article
the certain
a certain
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country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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, we cannot neglect some drawbacks which we will discuss in upcoming paragraphs. First and foremost thing is that countries are playing
crucial
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a crucial
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 role to promote
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
development in
positive
Change the article
a positive
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 manner . The
people
Use synonyms
 who are unable to pay
high
Correct article usage
the high
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 fees of colleges and universities but on that point of level government always
stand
Correct subject-verb agreement
stands
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 behind
of
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apply
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their individuals as
bridge
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a bridge
the bridge
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 to make a building .
Furthermore
Linking Words
, students who are poor , can
fulfill
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fulfil
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 their dreams and set an example for those who always make
an excuses
Correct the article-noun agreement
excuses
an excuse
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 that poverty
as
Correct your spelling
is
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genetically
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genetic
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. If higher authorities
helps
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help
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 the
people
Use synonyms
 to get more knowledge , new world formation is possible at any rate and nobody can stop to make
better
Correct article usage
a better
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 future.
for instance
Linking Words
 , Schools and universities can arrange or
anounce
Correct your spelling
announce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
awards for students who attain good marks.
However
Linking Words
, Some
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
countries
Add an article
the countries
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has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 been paying full tuition fees which
not
Add a missing verb
is not
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 good for them because they will make helpless and not try to achieve good positions. They will not feel any difference between awards and help.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Government
Correct article usage
the Government
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 have been making
people
Use synonyms
 so useless ,
instead
Linking Words
 of
this
Linking Words
 they can allow the students to do
part time
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
 work so they can earn something. They will tackle
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
new troubles on daily basis. In the
nut shell
Correct your spelling
nutshell
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,
Although
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 is
responsibility
Add an article
the responsibility
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 of
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 to create
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
 future
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 their native
people
Use synonyms
 rather than
this
Linking Words
 they can encourage the student to do
part time
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
 jobs to give them more flexible and solvable
tommorow
Correct your spelling
tomorrow
.
Submitted by davindergill98 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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