Governments spend a large amount of money every year on works of art. ( for example, pain things & sculptures ) Do you think this is a good or bad use of public money ?

It is argued that taking a risk in both their professional and personal

lives

Use synonyms

has positive or negative effects. In my view,

although

Linking Words

it brings some problems towards the environment and to their own financial status, the advantage is more important and meaningful. On the one

hand

Use synonyms

, it is undeniable that taking

risks

Use synonyms

brings problems.

First,

Linking Words

it endangers the environment.

For instance

Linking Words

, in the shipping industry where I work, if I take a risk

such

Linking Words

as letting a ship push through a typhoon at her normal speed, in the worst case, she can lose her balance and can be sunk.

This

Linking Words

will end up with oil leakage into the ocean and it will damage the water quality.

Second,

Linking Words

it will dramatically affect people’s financial status. If I decide to study abroad in my personal life, it costs so much and can cause bankruptcy.

On the other

Linking Words

hand

Use synonyms

, there are numerous merits to taking

risks

Use synonyms

It is clear that

Linking Words

innovation

Use synonyms

always comes with

risks

Use synonyms

hand

Use synonyms

hand

Use synonyms

in other words

Linking Words

, without taking a risk, there is no

innovation

Use synonyms

occurred.

This

Linking Words

brought us more advanced and healthy lifestyles.

For instance

Linking Words

, during COVID-19, at the ,beginning there

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

no cure solutions

therefore

Linking Words

many people who were infected had severe symptoms. Researchers took

risks

Use synonyms

and invented vaccines within a couple of months, and they saved many people’s

lives

Use synonyms

Furthermore

Linking Words

, taking

risks

Use synonyms

in our personal

lives

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as going abroad to study, will enrich our experience and build connections beyond the border, which is absolutely meaningful in our

lives

Use synonyms

. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

taking

risks

Use synonyms

has negative effects

such

Linking Words

as damaging the environment and reducing our money, my view is that its

merit

Fix the agreement mistake

merits

show examples

such

Linking Words

as bringing

innovation

Use synonyms

and improving our quality of life outweigh those disadvantages. With proper preparation and collaboration,

risks

Use synonyms

can be a chance for new

innovation

Use synonyms

and a step forward to a brighter future.

Sola

Jan 28, 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion need to be more developed and clearly present the main points. The essay lacks a clear progression of ideas and logical organization. Clear and comprehensive ideas are presented but need to be more focused on the question. Relevant specific examples are provided but can be further developed and linked more explicitly to the main points.

task achievement

The essay addresses the prompt but lacks a clear and consistent focus. The response needs to be more specific and directly tied to the question. The ideas are generally well-developed but could benefit from a more structured approach to fully address the prompt.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

311 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

cultural heritage
national pride
traditional arts
stimulating the economy
public art installations
support staff
enhancing local businesses
driving economic growth
public spaces
community engagement
quality of life
residents
educational programs
school curriculums
creativity
critical thinking
controversies
alternative investments
limited public resources
essential services
private sponsorship
collaborate
funding
cultural benefits

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
Some managers request the applicants to provide them with some personal info at the time of recruitment; some people believe that this deed can be beneficial for managers, and such data can be utilised in an appropriate way in the workplace. However, some individuals disagree with this notion. In the following paragraphs, I am going to elucidate both viewpoints and state my own opinion.
6
band
friend of yours invited you to a home party he/she arranged. However, you have I just missed this party. Now you want to apologise for not attending it. Write a letter to your friend to apologise. In your letter, • apologise to your friend • explain why you did not attend the party • say what you plan to do to make up for missing the party
How are you doing? Hope you are doing great and had a fun party with your family and friends.
7
band
In some areas of the US, a curfew is imposed in which teenagers are not allowed to be outdoors after a particular time without parents. Agree? Or disagree?
The Unita state restricted the hours of activities for teenagers and said that teenagers after an exact time can’t be out without their parents. The essay might agree because of bad friends and the other reason is the rising number of crimes.
6.5
band
Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some people hold a view that helping other countries is equal to helping ourselves, so many countries with high levels of wealth would love to donate funds to not rich countries. However, this behaviour does not bring advantages to solving poverty. Personally, I agree that developed countries should stop giving financial assistance to poor countries, in reverse, they need to take other measures. In this essay, it will explain my personal view of this topic and give examples.
9
band
Both government investment in public transport systems and reductions in public transport ticket prices would help to reduce transport pollution greatly. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
One of the most pressing challenges we face as a society is pollution. While there are various sources of contamination, vehicle emissions, mainly CO2, rank at the top of the list. Some argue that government investment in mass transit systems and lower ticket prices could effectively mitigate this issue. I wholeheartedly agree; initiatives aimed at creating eco-friendly public transportation systems and promoting their use at reduced prices would likely encourage more individuals to opt for public transit instead of relying on their cars.

Governments spend a large amount of money every year on works of art. ( for example, pain things & sculptures ) Do you think this is a good or bad use of public money ?

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

In some areas of the US, a curfew is imposed in which teenagers are not allowed to be outdoors after a particular time without parents. Agree? Or disagree?

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Both government investment in public transport systems and reductions in public transport ticket prices would help to reduce transport pollution greatly. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?