Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Write at least 150 words.

#say #opportunity

As a member of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society, we have equal rights,

independence

Correct word choice

and independence

show examples

to do and choose to earn

money

, but

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

wealth is not equally going in

this

capitalized world. Rich

people

have more alternatives than poor

people

as they have enough wealth to spend on anything. So, millionaires have more opportunities to give

Remove the article

apply

show examples

support

who needs their help. I suppose that becoming a wealthy person is

Change the article

the

show examples

best way to

support

others

Firstly

, businessmen can help

for

Change preposition

with

show examples

charity services by dividing a part of their profit and it will increase the reputation of the company

also

Moreover

, we can feel

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

self satisfaction

Add a hyphen

self-satisfaction

show examples

by engaging

actively

Replace the word

activities

show examples

to improve the quality of someone’s life.

For instance

, Rich

people

can give gifts and financial

support

for

Change preposition

show examples

child

Change preposition

in orphanage

show examples

orphanage

Fix the agreement mistake

orphanages

show examples

and they can feel happy by watching how children enjoy

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

gifts and their feedback which can’t buy

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

. Most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

religious

Add an article

the religious

show examples

leaders

also

try to promote the positive effects of giving something

for

Change preposition

show examples

others

among

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

prosperous men.

However

, if we haven’t

money

, we have opportunities to help

people

who need our courage.

For example

, education

expert

Fix the agreement mistake

experts

show examples

have

knowledge

Add an article

the knowledge

show examples

and they can give it to the students who

haven’t

Add a missing verb

do haven’t

show examples

enough facilities and live in remote areas by using correspondence education, though they haven’t time and

money

to travel

such

a long distance.

Furthermore

money

is not the only way to

support

people

who suffer from poverty or illness.

According to

the Lord Buddha, the only wealth that we can earn merits

Change preposition

apply

show examples

helping

others

. We can offer our blood ,

though

Correct word choice

whether

show examples

we are poor or rich and it doesn’t need

money

To sum up

, I can conclude that currency is not the only way that we can help

others

and, eventually, I believe that, if we think widely we have more options for giving

support

for

Change preposition

show examples

people

Submitted by kavindianjalee on Sun Jan 29 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

305 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion
Modern technology plays a crucial role in creating a borderless society, regardless of language. Some commentators argue that technology also has separated us from the real world. In this essay, I will examine both perspectives and provide my opinion on this matter.
<4
band
The differences between countries are becoming less and less evident. People all over the world wear the same fashions, watch the same t.v. channels, use the same brands and have similar eating habits. Do you think that the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?
It is undeniable fact that the adoption of different cultural is common thing in today's world.Although coping the different cultural offering the more advantages but we cannot ignore the drawbacks of it . Here ,i would discuss the pros of this trend outweigh the cons.
5
band
Some people think that some type of criminals should not go to prison, instead they should do unpaid work in the community. To what extent do you agree?
Nowadays criminal activities are becoming more and more common in our society. Someone might suggest that sentencing the lawbreaker to the prison is not the most efficent way of managing human resources, instead they should spend their time helping others. Im concerned that this is the best way of punishment that we have today.
5.5
band
In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?
Since Agriculture is a pivotal issue in communities, this subject should be paid attention. Despite its importance, some countries suffer from poverty and lack of agricultural products. This is occurring because the population of the world is rising and demands are far more than supplies. For tackling this problem health care system and education should be increased.
5
band
Some people are making new friends by using socializing network website and Internet chat rooms. Some people say that this is a good thing. Other people say that people should make new friends by face-to-face chat. Discuss these views and give your own opinion.
Friendship is one of the basic requirements of human beings. In this regard, some of them create it by exploiting the internet such as social networks and web pages and believe that it is a reasonable concept and others say that to make friends one has to meet in person. In this essay, I will explore the reasons behind this reason and discuss whether it is a positive or negative impact.

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Write at least 150 words.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion

The differences between countries are becoming less and less evident. People all over the world wear the same fashions, watch the same t.v. channels, use the same brands and have similar eating habits. Do you think that the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that some type of criminals should not go to prison, instead they should do unpaid work in the community. To what extent do you agree?

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Some people are making new friends by using socializing network website and Internet chat rooms. Some people say that this is a good thing. Other people say that people should make new friends by face-to-face chat. Discuss these views and give your own opinion.