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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opnion? What sort of punishments should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?

#children #difference #right #age #punishment #distinction #opnion #sort #punishments #parents #teachers #behaviour
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The phenomenon of what ages of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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develping
Correct your spelling
developing
children
Use synonyms
 should
be teach
Change the verb form
be taught
be teaching
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the
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apply
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critical thinking has aroused wide concern among various circles. Divergent as people's views on
this
Linking Words
 issue in question may be, I totally agree that
parents
Use synonyms
 should punish their kids appropriately in order to lead
children
Use synonyms
know
Add the particle
to know
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 their
behave
Replace the word
behaviour
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 is wrong
in
Change preposition
at
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a
Change the article
an
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 early age. Of all the reasons why it is important to lead
children
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learn
Add the particle
to learn
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 to analyse the situation and give a judgment starting before
go
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going
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 to primary school, probably the most significant one is that they are still in a stage that trends to listening to their
parents
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 but not peers.
For instance
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,
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this
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at this
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 age
of
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apply
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kids easier to share their communication content
between
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with
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 their friends to
parents
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.
This
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in turn
Add the comma(s)
, in turn,
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allow
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allows
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 us to have a chance to support them
of
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in
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makeing
Correct your spelling
making
a
Correct article usage
the
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 right decision or give them
a right punishments
Correct the article-noun agreement
a right punishment
right punishments
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 to realise it is wrong
such
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 as
reduce
Wrong verb form
reducing
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 their time to play. Another reason that should not be overlooked is that we can easier to pull a thought into their mind as their behaviour and personality still being
development
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developed
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.
For example
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, as
their
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they
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grow
Change the form of the verb
growing
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 up, they will start to rebel against their
parents
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 during the puberty stage.
Also
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, punishment will only escalate their reaction.
Beside
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Besides
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, they
are tend
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tend
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 to agree with their peers
in
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on
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anythings
Correct your spelling
anything
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. After that, they would develop their own philosophy about the world.
Therefore
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, if there
any
Add a missing verb
are any
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 things you want to teach your child, you should teach them as soon as possible. Under
this
Linking Words
 line of thinking, it seems to me that younger
children
Use synonyms
 are easier be teach before their personal characteristic is fixed and the
effection
Correct your spelling
affection
show examples
 by their friends.
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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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