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Band 4

Many young people change their jobs and career do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #change #jobs #career
In the
ultra modern
Add a hyphen
ultra-modern
show examples
 epoch,it is a point of debate that
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of young individuals modify their occupations
as well as
 professions.There are umpteen
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
benefits and drawbacks
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
 topic.The upcoming paragraph would shed light on my argument related to conception and will lead to a logical conclusion. Moving towards the merits first and foremost one is
Add an article
a
show examples
high incentive if individuals
change
 their designation they will reach on
higher
Add an article
a higher
the higher
show examples
 salary
of
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apply
show examples
package.
However
,
transform
Wrong verb form
transforming
show examples
 the
organisations
Change to a genitive case
organisation's
organisations'
show examples
 crowds will explore different experiences.Adding more to it people
also
 enhance their skills and knowledge.Apart from that changing of profession and company masses will
also
 get a high position of promotion.
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
show examples
 people
also
 get
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
lot
 of new
apportunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 in their life.
while
 individuals
also
 will
benifit
Correct your spelling
benefit
 to get
flexible
Add an article
the flexible
a flexible
show examples
 time of working. Probing ahead
towrds
Correct your spelling
towards
 the demerits if employees always
change
 their
carrer
Correct your spelling
career
 and work they will face a lack of stability.Moving
further
 they will waste so much time and money to
change
 their designation.
Additionally
Add a comma
,Additionally
show examples
 employees will cannot
growth
Replace the word
grow
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 in their profession and life
for example
 if the worker
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
 his time and extra effort to
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
one company for 2 years after that if the employee suddenly
change
Change the verb form
changes
show examples
 his designation and profile
then
 he
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 to start again from
begin
Change the form of the verb
beginning
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.
To conclude
,
change
 is the way of the world so,everyone
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
 to
change
 their profession and career for their growth
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 life but before they modify their career they should have to see their position
not
Add the comma(s)
,not
show examples
 money.
Submitted by sharma1997.rahulthakur on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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