IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people think living in big cities is bad for people’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experien

#people #cities #people’s #health #experien
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Living in a big
city
Use synonyms
 is very tempting since it has better facilities for education, and hospitals,
as well as
Linking Words
 better career opportunities. In spite of these pros of living in the
city
Use synonyms
, some people believe that it is bad for the
health
Use synonyms
. I agree that living in the
city
Use synonyms
 can harm someone's
health
Use synonyms
. Nowadays, living in a
city
Use synonyms
 which is overcrowded and overpopulated provides a higher chance of getting sick, for ,instance airborne diseases like influenza, cold and rotavirus, which can spread easily in crowded places.
Moreover
Linking Words
, harmful chemicals like smoke, dust, and gases, which are likely to be associated with lung disorder,
that is
Linking Words
 a huge threat to one's
health
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
city
Use synonyms
 life can find numerous restaurant, in
this
Linking Words
 case, many people are more likely to order fast foods, which has a high content of sugar and fat.
This
Linking Words
 leads to obesity that can be associated with other sicknesses like heart problems, high blood pressure and diabetes. There is
also
Linking Words
 huge pressure and a high workload when living in the
city
Use synonyms
 since everything is expensive like rent, food, and other extra activities like malling, cinemas and amusement parks,
this
Linking Words
 pushes folk to work harder to get enough money so they can avail living in the
city
Use synonyms
. Overworking leads to a high level of stress which eventually leads to depression. In conclusion, There are pros to living in big cities, but I totally agree that it can
also
Linking Words
 harm public
health
Use synonyms
 like lung cancer because of air pollution, obesity, emotional stress, and a high risk of getting airborne diseases and viruses. Prevention is better than cure, so it is better to stay away from the things and situations that may harm our well-being.
Submitted by leoriemadeo1287 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: