Some people think that it is beneficial for children to do paid work, while others think it can be harmful for children. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children doing paid work?

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Children
get opportunities to
work
at an early age. Some of them get compensated,
while
others do not.
This
essay will evaluate the benefits and drawbacks of
children
getting compensated for doing chores.
Firstly
, one benefit of
children
doing paid
work
is that they learn about the concept of
money
. When
children
receive
money
from
work
, they understand that the compensation is
resulted
Replace the word
result
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
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their performances and the time spent. They are more aware of the value of
money
and reduce the possibility
on
Change preposition
of
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wasting
money
.
Secondly
, having a paid job is
advantagious
Correct your spelling
advantageous
because it teaches
children
skills that they would not be exposed to
at
Change preposition
in
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school settings.
For instance
, many older
children
pick up social skills from working in the service industry and interacting with customers.
On the other hand
, one issue when
children
have a job is that it takes away precious play time from them. Specifically for young
children
, many parents and educators think that it is imperative for them to explore and play in an unstructured and free environment. Another negative issue of paid
work
is that it incentivises
children
to
work
for
money
. Some people believe that
this
can be detrimental in the long run for young
children
because
work
should be based on passion and cause. In conclusion,
children
understand the relationship between effort and compensation by getting paid at
work
, even though the time could be spent on other areas. In my opinion, as long as the
work
is balanced with school studies and free play, there is a lot to be learnt from working at a young age.
Submitted by cathrnwu on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • beneficial
  • harmful
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • financial independence
  • responsibility
  • valuable skills
  • impact
  • education
  • exploitation
  • negative effects
  • social life
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