Nowadays children watch much more television than they did in the past and spend less time on active or creative things. What are the reasons? And what measures should be taken to encourage children to spend more time on active or creative things?

#children #television #time #measures

Due to

the rise in technology, every child demands new gadgets and

devices

, no matter what

Verb problem

apply

show examples

their age.

Such

kinds of

devices

for instance

, computers,

television

Fix the agreement mistake

televisions

show examples

, laptops, and many more have become a status symbol in today's youth.

Moreover

, Teenagers are paying more attention to sophisticated

devices

rather than becoming a part of some recreational

activities

. The major reason includes not paying enough attention by

parents

towards their kids and the increasing trend of YouTubers and tiktokers. In order to overcome

this

complication,

parents

' engagement

has

Verb problem

show examples

needed and needs to encourage children to participate in recreational

activities

Initially

, in the past generation, women used to live at home and spend most of their

time

with their little ones, but as the era passed, women started working outside and had no

time

left for their kids.

As a result

, the growing generation spends most of their

time

on electronic

devices

Secondly

, people started to share their views and

opinion

Fix the agreement mistake

opinions

show examples

in the form of TikTok, reels, videos, stories, and so on. Eventually, adults and children are fascinated by

this

well-liked trend.

Furthermore

parents

play a significant role in their loved one's life. If both

parents

successfully manage the work-life balance, that will help to

attain

Verb problem

get

show examples

their

kid's

Correct your spelling

kids

show examples

involved in them

instead

of watching television.

Although

children like to spend their maximum

time

on screen, still there is a need to push them towards fun

activities

and games.

For example

, there are enormous numbers of recreational

activities

held in Public libraries which

offered

Wrong verb form

offer

show examples

students to participate free of cost. Having concluded, in the modern era of technology, it's a father's and mother's responsibility to help their kids remain busy towards some additional curriculum

activities

so that they will not spend their leisure

time

on television.

Submitted by nehaarora6286 on Fri Feb 03 2023

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task response

Address the task prompt more directly and provide a clearer response to each question.

coherence cohesion

Organize your ideas in a more coherent and cohesive manner. Ensure that your essay has a clearer structure and smoother transitions between ideas.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

293 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays children watch much more television than they did in the past and spend less time on active or creative things. What are the reasons? And what measures should be taken to encourage children to spend more time on active or creative things?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some feel that students should not have to take standardized tests in school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people prefer to have temporary jobs, which means they only work a few months in a year and use the rest of the time to do what they want. What is your opinion?

Some people believe that children should study all subjects at school, while others think they should only study subjects they are good at or find interesting. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

The breakthroughs in medical science are by far the most significant advances in world society over the last two centuries. Discuss this statement and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.