IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Some people believe that to become successful at a sport requires a natural ability, others think that hardwork and practice are more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #sport #ability #hardwork #practice
Many people think that to achieve the goal of
successful
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being successful
show examples
 athletes need a natural talent
while
 others believe that
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
 constantly is more
effectiveness
Replace the word
effective
show examples
. In
this
 essay, I will give
opinion
Correct pronoun usage
my opinion
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in
Change preposition
on
show examples
Correct article usage
the benefit
show examples
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
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 and
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
 of
this
 confliction. Generally, the most
succesful
Correct your spelling
successful
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
 player around the world
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 meet their dream goal since they were young because they might
found
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
 that they were wise and
talent
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talented
show examples
 in that
sports
Fix the agreement mistake
sport
show examples
. For
examples
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example
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, Ronaldo,
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
 most
succesful
Correct your spelling
successful
 football
players
Fix the agreement mistake
player
show examples
nowsaday
Correct your spelling
nowadays
. He
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
found himself
passion
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passionate
show examples
 about football and pass the contest for domestic
leaguage
Correct your spelling
league
language
since
Correct word choice
when
show examples
 he was in high school.
This
 is the reason to support that people who are gifted or have
natural
Add an article
the natural
show examples
ability
Fix the agreement mistake
abilities
show examples
 are likely to be successful in their way. On the other
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
show examples
, some people believe that
practice
Wrong verb form
practising
show examples
 constantly is the best way to archive their
succesful
Correct your spelling
successful
 because they will gain more
experieces
Correct your spelling
experience
experiences
 and
known
Wrong verb form
know
show examples
 their own
mistake
Fix the agreement mistake
mistakes
show examples
, these are the main factors that will
leads
Change the verb form
lead
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 you to improve yourself and become better
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 playing sports. For
instant
Add an article
an instant
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, the swimmer
need
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needs
show examples
 to
swims
Change the verb
swim
show examples
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 to practice themself and practice
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tolerance
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
tired
Replace the word
tiredness
show examples
. The more
practicing
Replace the word
practice
show examples
 is the
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
faster swims. In conclusion, I believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
to become the most successful at
sport
Add an article
a sport
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 requires both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
natural ability
also
practise
Correct your spelling
practice
show examples
 effort. Good players will use their
wise
Replace the word
wisdom
show examples
 to
leads
Wrong verb form
lead
show examples
 the game but to become the best players they need to keep
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
 harder than others.
Submitted by Natt on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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