shopping has become a favorite pastime among young people. Do you think they must be encouraged to do other things rather than shopping.

#pastime #people

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this

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contemporary epoch,there is a heated argument over the issue that marketing has become a best-loved era

pass

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passed

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among young individuals.

This

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essay will

further

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elaborate on reasons for the same in upcoming paragraphs.which leads to a logical conclusion. There is adequate evidence of

this

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view.These are substantial the top-notch reason is that shopping is

idea

Add an article

an idea

the idea

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to best present spend in free date.

However

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,when individuals do not have to do anything in their free occasion

then

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they think too much

as well as

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they mostly get confused so marketing is the course that people get refreshed their minds and relax their bodies.Adding more to it nowadays in most of the society there were a lot of shopping malls were opened as every day a lot of masses were visited for shopping in the mall and there on regular days all new trends came

as well as

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very different varieties of clothes,shoes,wallets and so many think which can attract to people and compelled to buy the stuff. Others with distinct view opine that

according to

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me individual should have to do participate in some particular activities rather than do shopping like music,painting,drama etc.

Moreover

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,playing play is the best plan to spend their free turn.

While

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there are significant benefits of playing play

such

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as playing business can help them to increase their working stamina

as well as

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people always make themselves fit and fine and active in their daily life.

Consequently

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playing

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

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or music or other activities will help them to make their career in some of that fields.whilst doing shopping is a waste of money and week in

this

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era.

To conclude

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well in my opinion shopping is

also

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Correct article usage

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means to spend their pastime but the government should have to hold some leisure activities every week so individuals have to spend their best pace

Change preposition

apply

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Remove the article

apply

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good use.

Submitted by sharma1997.rahulthakur on Sun Feb 05 2023

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
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take, for example

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12
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

305 words

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shopping has become a favorite pastime among young people. Do you think they must be encouraged to do other things rather than shopping.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

People believe that not all school children have the natural ability to learn a new language. This means is not right to force all school children to study a foreign language. Do you agree or disagree ?

Some people think that the range of technology currently available is increasing the gap between rich people and poor people. Others think that it is causing the opposite effect. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do the advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages? (Nguyen)

Some people believe Sports creates competition among school children rather than cooperative Do you agree or disagree and give your opinion

In the past, most working people had only one job. However, nowadays, more and more people have more than one job at the same time. What are the reasons for this development? What are the advantages and disadvantages of having more than one job?