Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree

this

modern era of technology, Music plays a significant role in gathering the population. Some communities suggest that it is crucial for the closeness of different traditions all over the world. I suggest that music is vital but there are ample other things included in combining the norms of a society. To commence with, it is really proliferating these modern days

as a result

of advancements in technology.

Firstly

, it depicts the rituals of one's state and attracts a plethora of folk including civilisations, behaviours and current issues of the country as well.

Therefore

, by listening to unusual operas people want to know more about the inhabitants of the territory and their relationship gets stronger by interacting with each other.

For example

, the Korean Pop music band named BTS expresses Korean culture by illustrating dance, and pop tunes and has millions of followers from all over the globe.

On the other hand

, some people face problems in understanding the lyrics of the song because of the different language barriers of the state.

Furthermore

, business and

also

travel documentaries play a huge role in

this

regard that represent the foods, cultures, and attitudes of the public of a particular state.

Consequently

, they get fascinated by a large majority of the people. To illustrate an example, the travel vlogger named Daud Kim explores captivating places of many states and vlogs them in a spectacular way that gets society's attention to know more about their norms. In conclusion, in light of these convincing arguments, I believe that opera

along with

travel and trade are the essential factors for mixing up the individuals of special traditions.

Submitted by fatimaiftikhar320 on Sun Feb 05 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

272 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural diversity
harmony
integration
bridging gaps
foster
ignite
embrace
communicate
celebrate
appreciate
inclusivity
universal language
emotional resonance
shared experiences
intercultural dialogue
intergenerational connections
cultural exchange
catalyst

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Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many differences from their home country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reasons? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that it is best to live in a horizontal city while others think of a vertical city. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The US film industry has too much influence on the film industry around the world. Governments have a duty to invest money in their own film industries to protect and develop their cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think doing sports to make physical strong is important, while others think mental strengths more important. Discuss both views and share your opinions.